'Chewbacca Mom' Is Officially a Figurine & We're Officially Done With the Internet

Watching capital-C Corporate brands talk about memes in an awkward, "cool mom" kind of way remains, to this day, one of the greatest things the Internet has ever offered us. Usually they ruin the joke and embarrass themselves in the process, which is great because then the rest of the world knows it's time to move on to something new. The latest iteration of this process is truly more awful and embarrassing than we could imagine: Hasbro is turning Chewbacca Mom into an action figure. Did your eyes just roll out of your eye sockets and onto the floor? OURS TOO.

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We know you're thinking that Chewbacca Mom has already been ruined -- first by the late-night/daytime/morning talk show appearances and then by the college scholarship thing. But that was all apparently an elaborate and expensive distraction so that we wouldn't notice what Hasbro was crafting up in the corner.

You got us, Hasbro. We didn't see this coming. Congratulations.

More from CafeMom: 8 Ways 'Chewbacca Mom' Is Giving Us Life

Hasbro called Candace Payne into their HQ and the CEO himself handed her a Chewbacca action figure -- minus a wookie head and plus a likeness of Candace's own. Plus a removable Chewbacca mask. Of course.

The toy also talks and says things like, "That's not me making that noise, it's the mask," and "I am such a happy Chewbacca." If these phrases don't make sense to you, YOU'RE NOT CRAZY. You're probably the most sane person here. But here's a refresher anyway:

The good news is that the toy was a one-off thing, and you won't see it popping up at Kohl's next to the original Chewie mask. Still, we can't help but sit here and wonder where our action figures are. What happened to the "all moms are heroes" thing? Prove it, Hasbro!!!!

More from CafeMom: 20 Kids' Toys That Offended or Creeped People Out (PHOTOS)

Whatever. We're happy Candace gets this toy, and we're happy her kids got to sashay down a red carpet and enjoy Hasbro HQ, which we assume is a pretty fun place.

But now we need to stop. Let Chewbacca Mom live on the Internet where she belonged, guys. It's time to pick a new meme to ruin.

 

Image via HasbroNews/Twitter

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