Dirt Bag Colleges: Would You Let Your Kid Attend?

penn stateIt wasn't that long ago when I myself was filling out common apps, touring campuses, and planning my freshman year fall wardrobe. The college decision process can be an exhausting and exhilarating one, but thankfully there are tons of books and lists out there that help high school seniors decide which schools they think they want to go to. Like The Rogers & Littleton Guide to America's Douchiest Colleges, for example. Forget US News & World Report, I think this list is probably the only list college applicants need to consider.

And it's pretty hysterical, if not obvious.


Your top ten douchiest schools are:

  • Cornell (uh duh)
  • Penn State (pretty sure that's where everyone from Road Rules went, natch)
  • Yale (Jessica Simpson's fiance is a grad, soooo, yeah)
  • Stanford (if they'd invented Facebook, they would have invented Facebook)
  • Pepperdine (the campus is so pretty! We love Malibu! We love God!)
  • Brigham Young (actually this was surprising. I'm too scared to even think of a Mormon douche.)
  • Bennington College (it's in Vermont, they were asking for it)
  • University of Delaware (Delaware has a university?)
  • M.I.T. (another sleeper ... didn't think their social skills were high enough to be considered for a douche roll.)
  • University of Florida (well, OBVS)

I'm surprised my Alma mater, Boston College, didn't make the top ten. I'm happy it didn't, don't get me wrong, but I had to brush the douches out of my face when I walked to class, they were like pollen. The air was thick with them. Anyway, another glaring omission is one Duke University, but that's a post for another time.

So! As your teen whittles down the list of school's he/she wants to go to, will the school's douche level be a factor? From someone who went to a douchey-school and had the time of her life, met her best friends, and managed to get a job offer (even a few!) after school, I don't think it matters too much. Unless of course your kid is a douche, in which case I would advise you to separate her/him from their kind and send them to a non-douche school. Douches only encourage each other ... I would hate to see your child fall into that crowd, permanently.

Do you have a rising senior and do these types of lists about colleges effect your decisions?

Photo via caitlinator/Flickr

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