Maci Bookout Grills the Men in Her Life About What Keeps Marriage Hot

maci bookout and husband taylor
macideshanebookout/Instagram

Since I do happen to be on a reality TV show, I'm constantly doing press interviews, and I usually get asked the same few questions over and over. One of the more frequent questions is, "You are married with three children, you each own your own companies, you film for a TV show ... how do you and your husband keep the spark alive?"

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I'm really not sure why this question bothers me, but honestly, it does bother me. Probably because when doing interviews, it is asked in a way that sounds more like, "You own a company, run a household, film a TV show ... how do you have time to give your husband the attention he wants? What do you do to keep him happy and interested in you?"

Truth be told, my husband and I are both very busy, stressed, and overwhelmed. We are both raising our children, we both work our asses off, and both of us are way beyond exhausted. But before all of that, we are partners and we are best friends. 

When I first began working on this post, I thought I would just answer it the way I typically do, but go into more specific details than what is sometimes said in an interview. But the more I delved into my answer, the more irritated I became from people asking me, but never daring to ask my husband this question.

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In addition to Taylor, I also asked a couple of my trusted male friends to share with me what their role is in keeping the spark alive. Considering I'm about to share some of my closest friends' somewhat personal thoughts/feelings, I'd like to first say thank you to the men who took the time to do something that they never, ever thought they would do. Here goes nothing.

Engaged & First-Time Parents:

"Shit, keeping the spark alive is actually a lot harder than most people think when a child is involved. Time is always limited. Ideally I would like to have date night once a week, but with hectic work schedules and lack of babysitters, we are lucky to have date night twice a month -- which could be dinner and drinks, dinner and bowling, or even just having some beers or wine in the hot tub out back and just relaxing. 

"As a father, seeing how amazing of a mother she is turns me on and makes me try to do as much as I possibly can around the house to help out. I also try to be the best father I can be, which turns her on and creates some spark. Some women can be self-conscious of their body post baby, but I make sure to tell her every day that she is looking beautiful or sexy and grab a handful of that ass anytime she is in the kitchen or standing in front of me, haha. I'll give her a neck and back massage before bed -- which usually turns into 'other things.' It's important to me to make sure I tell her every day that I love her, especially when she isn't expecting me to say it. Like if we're just hanging on the couch watching TV. I don't know if I'm very good at keeping the spark alive, but I still try to be a gentleman, a dirty-minded pervert, and to keep her laughing as much as possible." 

Newlyweds:

"The daily grind gets stressful at times and we can lose thought of the fun stuff we started our relationship on in the early days. So for me it's simple -- nothing gets my wife going more than a nice date night to our go-to sushi spot. Not only is it her favorite food, but she knows it's not very cheap. She appreciates things like that and it shows her my love in a different way. (It also creates a fun and romantic night afterwards, because we all know you can't eat sushi without having your fair share of sake or beer ... Without saying too much, our night just gets better and better.)

"On a more sentimental side, I can always tell when my wife is stressed out or just feeling down. In those times I like to just sit and talk to her about things that I know interest her, like cooking, baking, and scrapbooking (even though I could give zero shits about that stuff). I know it makes her feel better. It keeps the spark alive in our relationship because even though I may not care about scrapbooking, she knows that I do care about her feelings."

And ... Taylor:

When I first mentioned this blog post and the direction I wanted it to go in, Taylor literally responded with, "Golf!" Haha, that is something we do together that definitely keeps the spark going. After a day or two he texted his answer to me, and I didn't even have to remind him about it -- what a sweetie! (Haha, sorry, ladies -- he is all mine!)

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And here is Taylor's response:

"What keeps the spark alive? With 3 children, baseball tournaments, multiple businesses and those pesky cameras following us around, we rarely get time alone. But I've learned it's the simple things that do it for us. Dinner for two is amazing when we can squeeze it in, but sometimes the simple gestures of appreciation for what my wife does can make her day. A kiss on the cheek, grabbing her hand in public, or a pat on the butt and a "see you in bed" as I pass her in the kitchen are all things I try to do to keep the spark alive.

"Going to bed a little earlier so we can have some alone time before we're passed out snoring can make all the difference in our hectic lives. I try to frequently remind her that if she 'keeps wearing that bathing suit we're going to have baby #4 real soon.' I love her as my wife and as the mother of our children, and so every day I try to do the little things to let her know I love her, appreciate all she does, and that the flame is definitely still lit." 

(Isn't he the greatest?!?)

Something I learned while writing this blog ... men do listen to us and pay attention to what we may need or want at any given moment. Sometimes they just say it differently than us, and we can't be mad at them for that. I hope you all enjoyed the "in-depth" thought process from a male's perspective.

Until next time: Go golf, get sushi, and grab your significant other's ass --  you'll never go wrong!

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