'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Recap: Lisa Rinna Is THE GREATEST

lisa rinna

This week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Lisa Rinna proved that she's the best thing to happen to the show since sliced bread little black bandage dresses. 

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I haven't said much about Lisa "Lips" Rinna's arrival to RHOBH, but that's not because I'm not a fan. If anything, Lisa has continually made her mark this season by being the sassy, swear-lovin' voice of reason. I'm a step away from making "Lisa 4 President" pins. The only thing keeping me from doing so is the fact that I've got $12 in my bank account and cats in need of kitty chow -- costly, costly kitty chow. 

This season, the civil war between Kim and Kyle Richards has slowly taken center-stage. Let us all pause to imagine Kim in drag as Robert E. Lee. Since we've gone there, allow me to go further -- you just know Kyle would be General Pickett, you just KNOW it. Ken Burns -- I'm looking at you, bub. 

If we continue with the civil war, I'm not sure who that makes Brandi. I kind of feel like since she is defending Kim (the South), that makes her ... France? Hold on, I have to check, it's been a while. Okay, back! And yeah, Brandi's totally France. Continuing in this vein, that makes Lisa Rinna Abraham Lincoln, and while no slaves were emancipated this week, Lisa did something utterly remarkable all the same: She won Brandi Glanville over! And got her to admit that Kim needs help! I died! Twice! It was intense! There was a bright white light and also I peed a little! 

Sans outmoded but thoroughly presidential top-hat, Lisa did what I've been dying to do from my sofa and across the country -- she was all, "You guys, Kim has a serious problem, Brandi needs someone to talk to her in a straight-shooting way, let's figure this out, it's fucking serious." Then I hugged her. 

Did it feel strange to have Lisa repeatedly dropping the E-word (enabler) on a show where some could make the argument that Kim's disease has been deliberately enabled and monetized for years? Yes. But what it lacked in meta-self-awareness, it made up for in actually maybe doing some good. Eileen Davidson's awkward lunch with the Richards sister solved nothing. But Lisa's direct and sincere way of tackling the underlying issues could save the day!

Which new housewife should get a spin-off? Why?

 

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