'DWTS' Recap: Elimination Results Even More Shocking Than Last Week

dancing with the starsAfter reeling from last week's controversial elimination of Christina Milian on Dancing With the Stars, I think we were all ready for one of those "Yeah, we knew they'd be eliminated" moments because we really couldn't deal with two crazy outcomes in a week. But that was just not the case this time, dancing friends. Oh no. 

Things got a little nutty. There were cheeseburgers and J. Lo on this episode. Oh yes. And an extra dose of omg really?


Let's talk about Bill & Emma. Funnyman Bill Engvall had to dance with a cheeseburger. Sort of. I'm just not into all these silly props. The cheeseburgers. Really? Necessary? I know it had to do with the song but it doesn't have to be so literal. Just give me your tango, skippy.

Then we have the beautiful Elizabeth Berkley who with the largest doe eyes I've ever seen saying something like it's empowering to be the woman I am instead of the girl I was. Ooooh. Deep. Shed your former self, girl. Then she went on to shake her groove thing kind of like she did in Showgirls. Those eyes! Those eyes! They are so large. And then the unthinkable happened and she made a reference to not wanting to look like a deer in headlight. Honey, you just look like that all the time. It's a good look though. Those eyes! Those eyes! Pretty pretty.

In case you didn't know Jennifer Lopez and Leah Remini are like besties (I knew!) and so of course J. Lo shows up with her man-boy Casper to support Leah and remind her how much she worked her ass off dancing (or not) and that it's hard but she can do it. She does it, but damn she threw a little tantrum when they told everyone about that improv music change-up thingy that was going to give you four extra points if you are the best. Leah thought she'd be the worst. She ended up being right.

From those little teasers when they show the couples practicing and screwing up left and right, I thought for sure the Amber & Derek dance was going to be ten kinds of awful and then they come out and they NAIL IT! Amber rules! She also won the extra points for the improv thing. So did Corbin. But none of that really mattered. What mattered is how adorable Snooki is. Oh, I'm sorry, Nicole. So cute! In yellow!

And then the moment of truth. The big shocker! It's down to Jack and Bill and I'm thinking oh nos, not Jack! And Jack was safe and then Bill and Emma get all sad and tears are being shed and then the judges say you're safe too and everyone got a case of the confused. Apparently there was some sort of technical glitch last week with the voting so they didn't want to factor that in so everyone is coming back to show us their funky groove things again.

Bill sure got lucky.

Who do you think is going to be eliminated next?


Image via ABC

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