'Game of Thrones' Recap: Sansa Stark Just Can't Catch a Break

Sansa Stark Game of ThronesHope you've enjoyed the first five episodes of Game of Thrones season 3 so far -- can't believe there are only five more to go! Major sad face because I think it's safe to say that this has been the best season yet, as the fifth episode, "Kissed By Fire," introduced even more shocking twists and turns that A Storm of Swords fans have been so pumped to see.

After witnessing what was maybe one of the best scenes ever on television in last week's "And Now His Watch Is Ended," with Daenerys being a BOSS, this episode had a lot to live up to. Between an epic sword fight, an unlikely marriage proposal (or two), a heartfelt monologue, and a forbidden romance -- needless to say, this was quite an action-packed hour.

Let's get into it! Warning: Spoilers ahead if you haven't seen the episode! That should be pretty obvious to you by now, right?


First: Gotta love an Eddard Stark flashback cameo.

We get right into the duel between Beric Dondarrion and the Hound, on trial for murder. Beric's able to light his sword on fire, thanks to R'hllor, also known as the Lord of Light, which makes for a very cool visual. It's an awesome fight, with shattered shields, creepy chanting ... and a resurrection! Thoros of Myr, the red priest who brings Beric back from the dead, seems to be a helpful man to have along. Poor Arya's just not having a good episode this week: First the Hound is let go, then Gendry decides that he's staying with Beric, the one friend she has left.

THEN, after Thoros and Beric discuss the many times he's been brought back to life, Arya asks, "Can you bring back a man without a head?" obviously referring to her father. Jeez, Arya's just breaking hearts in this episode.

We also finally get a moment that Game of Thrones fans have long anticipated. Jon Snow and Ygritte play a flirty game of steal-the-sword. She takes him to a warm cave with a waterfall, strips down, and asks him to break his vows -- it doesn't take much convincing. And she delivers probably one of the most epic "you know nothing, Jon Snow"s ever. Ah, congrats Jon, no longer a maiden!

Catching up with our other favorite couple, Jaime and Brienne are brought to Lord Bolton in Harrenhal, and Jaime's stump is taken care of in quite a nausea-inducing way. I'll fully admit to closing my eyes. Jaime and Brienne both get naked together and take a bath, in a very non-sexy way. We see a new side of Jaime (not just his butt) as he gives a heartfelt monologue about why he became the Kingslayer. He seemed to even change Brienne's mind, and the expression on her face during his speech was just perfect. Jaime's getting more likable by the episode, but it's about time the dude had a bath.

There's a big moment for Robb Stark too. Five men kill two sleeping boys, "the Kingslayer's kin," Tywin Lannister's nephews, all in response to Catelyn letting Jaime free. Robb shows his badass side, ordering them all to die. When one man says he was only there keeping a lookout, Robb commands, "This one was only the watcher. Hang him last so he can watch the others die." But he soon realizes he'll have to call on the Freys for help, whose daughter he was supposed to marry. Hope Walder Frey will be in a forgiving mood ... (most likely not).

And now let's get to the last five minutes, where a HUGE TWIST is introduced. Baelish Littlefinger gets wind of the Tyrells' plans to wed Sansa and Loras from Loras's new lover -- even though, as Tyrion says, Sansa is missing some of Loras's favorite bits. Tywin meets with Tyrion and Cersei and says Sansa is the heir to Winterfell if Robb dies, so whomever she marries will be lord of Winterfell, and Tywin wants it to be in his family.

Cersei is very excited when Tywin announces that it's Tyrion who's going to marry Sansa. But Cersei's happiness is short-lived. She's told that she must marry Loras, which she adamantly refuses, since she's in love with her brother Jaime. Tywin gets up and announces how disappointed he is with his children, leaving the two of them alone. Both cannot look at each other, drowning in their own misery and what's in store for their futures. What a twist! Poor, poor Sansa! Just when she thought she was getting the marriage of her dreams.

Some other musings:

  • Everyone on this show has really nice butts (or butt doubles).
  • Gotta love a convo between Lady Oleanna and Tyrion. Tyrion is schooled by her wit but gets what he wants in the end; still, Oleanna's one of the best parts of season 3.
  • Stannis Baratheon's wife, Lady Selyse, has stillborn babies in jars? Um, creepy.
  • The Unsullied, in Daenerys' command, choose a hot leader, Grey Worm. She tells them they can change their names, but Grey Worm has the perfect response: "Grey Worm is the name given when Daenerys Stormborn freed me."
  • Robb Stark is definitely a better head chopper-offer than Theon, that's for sure.

Do you think Sansa is going to have to marry Tyrion?


Image via HBO

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