'Jersey Shore' Recap: Let's Just Get This Over With Already

SnookiSo it seems MTV is as anxious to bid adieu to Jersey Shore as the rest of us. Both last week and this week they've shown two back-to-back episodes, and before you know it, there will be no more to show. It’s kind of like removing a Band-aid – get it over quickly, and it will be less painful.

We started out with Snooki moving into her own pad, which was one of many mature moves we know she made in her motherhood journey.  She laid down some rules, “Absolutely no sluts in the house, no skanks, no drinking … kind of like a pregnancy house." Which was great for Snooki, but there's not a whole of that happening anywhere this summer as Pauly D is the only single one in the house. Oh there was the random girl showing her boobs and vagina, but that was just sad.


I'm glad for their livers and sexual health, but it's certainly making for one dull season. I was hoping they would go out with a bang, but so far it's just a disappointing little pop.

Mostly it was just more of the same old stuff, but in a tamer (read: boring) way. Mike is still a slime ball, just a sober one. He loves Paula but doesn't want to be taken off the market. I will give him props for singing "Rehab," however. He kind of rocked that.

Deena is ridiculously, annoyingly lovesick. I'm happy for her and Chris, but they are just sickening and sappy in their love. "I thought I knew what love was but I didn’t know until I met Chris," she actually said. She's got to be a joy to live with.

Sam and Ron started bickering again, though at least things didn't get bad ... yet. JWOWW and Roger had some problems after he showed up late to the party she'd planned for him, but seeing as how we know they're now engaged, it doesn't really matter.

Then there was the BIG fight that was all hyped up as the biggest in Jersey Shore history, but even that was just predictable. And ... well that's about it. It was pretty much 50 shades of boring for the entire two LONG hours. Maybe next week they can just roll all of the rest of the episodes, and we can just end things once and for all.

Best line of the night came from Deena, with a balloon stuffed up her shirt: "It's hard to Jersey Turnpike while pregnant."

What do you think of Jersey Shore so far this season?


Image via MTV

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