'Real Housewives of Orange County' Season 7 Premiere Recap: Reunited & It Feels So Fake

Alexis BellinoTonight we were back once again where it all started -- The Real Housewives of Orange County. It's hard to believe this is the franchise's seventh season and just how many spin-offs it has inspired in its wake. But what they dished up tonight was even harder to believe. It was as if all that screaming and feuding last season never happened, or that it was so minor that it could all be fixed with friendship bracelets and mojitos.

I'm all for forgiveness, but ... really? Tamra Barney and Gretchen Rossi were mortal enemies last year. They HATED each other. But somehow, after a little lunch, they were having a secret friend-love affair with one another. I needed a little more convincing for why Tamra was so quick to apologize than her offering of: "There's a reason why dogs sniff each other's asses before becoming friends." But I can't wait to see how jealous Vicki gets when she finds out she didn't get a friendship bracelet.


The whole thing was almost as ridiculous as Alexis Bellino's attempt at live television with Dr. Booty for National Booty Awareness Month. Rejoice, Jesus Barbie is back in all her hypocritical glory. The anchors' looks after her segment aired said it all.

More from The Stir: Gretchen Rossi & Tamra Barney Weird Off-Screen Friendship

At least Alexis and Peggy Tanous didn't just magically make up. Alexis still thinks it's Peggy's fault for not telling her about her previous relationship with Jim, and seems to think that maybe she's still even interested in him (yeah, right). At a party Vicki Gunvalson decided to host for everyone -- Cajun-style since she is dating a guy from Mississippi now -- the two eyed each other, but exchanged no words ... yet.

New housewife Heather Dubrow also entered the scene in all of her refined and classy glory. "She's very tall, very thin, very pretty ... and she’s probably a bitch," Tamra concluded after showing her a $4.9 million piece of land. She didn't buy the land because she could see unsightly rooftops from it, but she did get herself invited to Vicki's party. Tamra is just itching to get Heather in Alexis's face because she knows she's going to be green with envy that she has real money and doesn't just pretend to be rich.

I don't know about Heather yet. She doesn't seem to have a lot of spark in her -- at least not the kind to mix it up with the existing housewives. But maybe there's more there than meets the eye.

We also were briefly introduced to Sarah Winchester, who is identified on the Bravo site as a "Friend of the Housewives," and Gretchen described as a brunette version of her. It will be interesting to see what role she plays, if any. Remember the disappearing Fernanda Rocha, who was introduced last season, never to be seen again? Let's hope she's not another of those.

More from The Stir: 'Real Housewife' Gretchen Rossi Stops at Nothing to Hide Her Secrets

It was definitely a slow and rocky start for RHWOC, which is disappointing because they've always been my favorite. Thankfully, previews look better and promise some big drama. Let's hope they deliver and live up to their job as the pioneers they are.

What did you think of tonight's episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County? Do you think Tamra and Gretchen's truce will last? How do you think Heather Dubrow will mesh with the group?

Image via Bravo

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