Steven Tyler's 'Bad' National Anthem Was Exactly What We Expected (VIDEO)

steven tylerOkay, so Steven Tyler didn't exactly deliver patriotic glory when he sang the national anthem before the Patriots-Ravens game yesterday. His performance brought to mind more the shower murder scene in the movie Psycho. But ... what did you expect? Whose idea was it to invite a 63-year-old former frontman from a hair band to sing the national anthem? Were you thinking he might sound kind of more like Andrea Bocelli?

Tyler sang it like the aging rock star that he is. I mean, if you want extra cheese and pepperoni you order a pizza, not a salad. Know what I mean?

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I'm impressed that he pulled off the song at all. He remained upright! The whole time! And he got, like, most of the words right. True, one should try and get ALL the words of the national anthem correct when one sings it. Tyler’s “And the rockets’ red glare as bomb bursting in air“ kind of sounded like he was thinking, “Uhhh, can't remember what this song is about, something about, like, bombs and stars?” But again, it’s Steven Tyler. Years of drug use have bored holes in his brain too big to hold all those confusing lyrics.

Imagine how much worse this song would have sounded had he not done it Steven Tyler-style. No WAY would he have been able to hit those high notes! (I'm using the phrase "hit those high notes" loosely, of course.) He would have just sounded like some pitiful old man, instead of an old man wearing fur and sequins! If anything, being true to yourself and exhibiting an independent spirit, however obnoxious, is about as American as it gets.

Anyway, if you bought a watermelon and then complained because it made a lousy car tire you would get laughed out of customer service. Don't want to hear a screechy, off-kilter national anthem? Hire someone else. I have two words for those people who were expecting some sort of pitch-perfect performance from Steven Tyler: DREAM ON

Do you think it was a silly idea to hire Steven Tyler to sing the national anthem?

 

Image via the16v/YouTube

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