Parent Wonders If Day Care Worker Saying 'I Love You' to Toddler Is Normal & Sparks Interesting Debate



Entrusting someone with your child is bestowing a huge responsibility on that person. As parents, every time we drop off our kids we are saying "Here is a piece of my heart. Please look after it like you would your own." And there are plenty of day care workers who do that with all their might. 

  • Naturally children and their caregivers should bond on some level, but one mom was wondering if her toddler's day care worker was being appropriate.

    "I picked up my child today from daycare and as we were leaving my child wanted their dummy (trying to ween off them)," the mom recounted on Reddit. "The daycare worker (50ish female) spoke to my child then cuddled them and said 'I love you.'"

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  • She understood that they spent time together but really wondered if it was normal for day care workers to express affection like that. 

    Some parents expressed that these workers have a profound impact on their children.

    "I call my daughter's daycare teacher her daycare mom and we've become outside of daycare friends," shared one mother. "She's with her half of her day. She comforts her, plays with her, wipes her tears when I'm not able. I know she loves her, and that makes me happy, personally."

  • Day care workers and teachers also responded in droves, attesting that they love their "kids" and tell them so -- often!

    "I work in a preschool, I tell my kids how much I love them every day," one teacher wrote. "I'm so sad that I didn't get a chance to give them one last hug and tell them how special they are before the school shutdown. I ended all of our virtual lessons by saying 'I love you and I hope we see each other soon!'"

  • Others acknowledged that it was normal, but there are limits. 

    "I don't mind people telling my child(ren) they love them, as long as there are absolutely no physical boundaries crossed," wrote one user. "Lap sitting is okay. Cuddling is okay. Do not ever kiss someone else's child."

  • The kissing debate varied, with some saying never in a million years and others saying there are exceptions to that rule. 

    "I also don't mind when someone 'kisses' my child's 'booboos,'" wrote one parent. "But definitely no kisses on the lips! I don't even do that with my child."

    But some have a total no-kiss policy

    "Our family rule is hugs and high fives are okay but don't kiss my kid," warned one parent. "It may very well be innocent but despite the germ factor, kids need to learn boundaries."

  • The truth is, there is no such thing as "too much love" when it comes to children. 

    Children need affection to thrive and survive. According to The Urban Child Institute:

    "Attachment reflects how safe, comfortable, and assured a child feels. Babies and toddlers need this sense of security in order to fully develop the skills that help them grow into independent, confident children."

    If you have to place those kids in day care, they should be with people who nurture affection in an appropriate manner.