Moms' Wildest Potty Training Confessions

toddler on potty

Potty training is a true test of parental stamina ... and stomachs. Many a mom has a story about finding "poop art," stepping in surprise puddles, or worse. Whether you're pondering the hazards before you start your potty training journey or just want to laugh and sympathize with this parental rite of passage, read on for moms' grossest potty training confessions (and try not to gag yourself)!

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  1. 'Look at the pretty picture, Ma!'
    "During a nap one day right around when we were potty training, my son decided to become a fecal artist and 'painted' a mural on the wall. There was crap everywhere, including on his face, even blocking one of his nostrils. I starting heaving when I walked in his bedroom to wake him up -- clearly he hadn't gotten much sleep!"
  2. Something stinks ...
    "The worst potty training event we had was probably my son pooping on a towel and hiding it behind the door of his room. That whole side of the house reeked, and we ended up tearing apart both the kids' rooms to try and find where the smell was coming from!"
  3. Lock it in
    "My son took his diaper off one morning and started using the potty. One day he decided to go in the bathroom without me. He shut and locked the door! There were no locksmiths available right away, so I called the fire department. Six firemen showed up to unlock the door. My son was inside happily playing with his pants down, the sink going, and the shower running. He had used the potty though!"
  4. Nice neighbors!
    "Early on during potty training, my son stopped and dropped a load on the neighbor's front lawn as we were walking from the car to my house. Luckily I did not really like those neighbors anyway."
  5. Chop chop
    "During potty training my 2-year-old son would hide and go number two in unusual places. One time, I found him underneath the dining room table, naked, cutting up his poop into little pieces with a butter knife."
  6. Close but no cigar ...
    "We are potty training my 2-year-old daughter right now, and I was outside doing laundry when she came to the door and said, 'Mama I poopoo!' and had no diaper on. So I came in the house and saw a pile of baby poop on the floor by my couch! Then, another two times, I found a pile of poop in the bathroom right next to the toilet. She had the right idea to take her diaper off and sit on the potty, but she didn't stay on the potty long enough."
  7. The dog ate what?!
    "When [I was] helping my child wash their hands, our dog snuck in the bathroom and ate the poop out of the little potty. I was so disturbed."

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  8. Catch!
    "My son once fished a poop ball out of his diaper to toss to my sister-in-law. She just thought it was a bouncy ball and tossed it back. I caught whiff of it and was horrified when I realized what he had done. I think my SIL was more horrified though. I know you aren't supposed to force potty training, but I did after that. I was afraid where he was going to take it. Meanwhile, my sister-in-law is still childless, and I suspect my kids are the reason."
  9. If the shoe fits ...
    "My son didn't like to poop on his little potty chair. So he once hid in the coat closet and pooped in one of my snow boots. It was a runny and horrible mess!"
  10. Who's the boss?
    "My husband had his boss coming over for a cookout. This was the first time he had been to our house. My son was napping and I walked by his room and smelled poop. I went in to find poop all over his wall, bed, carpet, and himself. Then the door bell rang."
  11. Not-so-fruity pebbles
    "When my oldest two were babies -- about 1 1/2 and 2 1/2 -- the younger one was a little constipated and was pooping pebbles. In the middle of the night, I heard her laughing hilariously in their room. I walked in and the little one was hanging over the edge of her crib tossing her 'pebbles' at the sleeping older one's face. And yes, a few made it into her mouth."

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  12. Wipe-out
    "My daughter basically trained herself, just came up to me one day and said, 'Mum, I think I'm ready for underwear now.' So I got rid of diapers, and it has been underwear since then. We've had very few accidents. Except the first time she decided to poop on the potty, she didn't tell me, she just came out and stuck her hand in my face and one of her fingers went up my nose and she said, 'Smell that, I got poop on my hand when I was wiping.' And yes, she had ... I was smelling it all day after that."
  13. Bathtime
    "My son -- who is 3 -- was in his first week of potty training, doing very well all by himself, going when he was supposed to. Well, one day he says, 'Momma, I gotta go pee,' so I take him to the bathroom. I suddenly realize I forgot the wipes, so I run into our room to get them and I come back to find him pooping in the bathtub! I'm like 'Oh my God no!' This can't be happening. He looks up, jumps when he realizes I was in the room with a horrified face, falls back, and sits on his poop. I help him up and a big piece of poop is stuck to his butt and the rest is sliding down his legs. He's freaking out screaming, 'Get this off of me please, Mom'; I am freaking out because I am not sure where or how I'm supposed to clean this. I grab a towel and wet it and clean my toddler up. I then have to dig out chunks out of the bathroom. I bleach the hell out of the tub like there was no tomorrow."
  14. Chew on this ...
    "I have identical twin boys. When they were 1 1/2, we told them about pooping and how we do it in the toilet and the usual. Well, one day I was in my room on the phone and left them alone for about a minute. I come out and notice one is chewing on something. I open up his mouth to find that he had reached into his brother's pull-up and took the poop out of it and ate it. I had to scoop it out of his mouth while trying not to throw up. I am going to be an ER nurse and nothing really bothers me. I've had throw up in my mouth, been peed on many times, but this took the cake."
  15. Down boy!
    "I'm actually finishing up potty training my 2-year-old boy. He just went pee in the potty and was reciting what I tell him to do: 'Push it down, aim in the potty.' Well, when he went to aim down, he pushed his boy parts up instead and peed all over his tummy and chest. He gasped and then yelled, 'Down! DOWN!'"
  16. Need a lift?
    "When our daughter was potty training at 17 months, she walked up to my husband, lifted her leg, and peed on him, then walked away. No idea why!"

What's your grossest potty training story?

 

Image via Saklakova/shutterstock

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