Buy Toddler Flavored Water!

Flickr photo by Randy Son of Robert
No, the water doesn't taste like toddlers. Wednesday Addams will be more depressed than usual.

But a host of waters are being marketed TO our kids because, gosh darn it, they can't be expected to just get that stuff out of the tap.

Yeah, yeah, childhood obesity = bad; water = good. 

So why don't you walk your little fanny over to the sink and fill that sippy cup, Mom and Dad?


Or you could let the companies do it for you -- to-may-to, to-mah-to.

Take the new brand that literally screams annoying at you -- WAT-AAH! promises "to make moms and kids aware that there is an alternative to soda and other sugary drinks that tastes great, is legitimately healthy, and genuinely cool."

Great, another thing my kid needs to think is "cool" instead of simply accepting as a fact of life.

News flash: I listen to Frank Sinatra and wear 100% cotton jeans. I'm not cool for any age group, and my daughter has to follow my rules. That includes drinking at least a few cups of water a day. No, it's not going out of style.

Then there's HINT, another one that shows up in my email inbox with promises to wean my kid off the sugary drinks with sugar-free flavors. Their "Moms Against Sugar Water Campaign" would be more hilarious if it didn't actually have moms lining up to sign on.

There's a better way to do this, folks. Repeat after me ... stop ... letting ... the marketers ... take ... YOUR MONEY.

That's it.

Wait, it's not.

Stop letting the marketers do your job.

Go ahead. Tell me your kid is too picky. Tell me she hates water. Tell me she thinks it's disgusting.

Now tell me how some miracle marketing scheme is going to do a better job of helping your kid than you, the parent.

Well, when you put it that way ...

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