POSTS WITH TAG: toddler development

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    Ugh. When it comes to how moms treat other moms, well -- let's just say we do our best to understand that we all parent differently and we try and respect that.

    But let's be honest -- sometimes it's next to impossible not to put on our judgy pants when we see another mom doing something odd, inappropriate, or just downright mean as far as dealing with her child goes.

    And in those instances, I think it's safe to say we all can agree that it's ok to mumble under our breath about what a craptastic parent she is -- whether it's all the time or in that particular moment.

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    Every parent likes to think that their child is a genius. How many times have you heard moms trying to one-up each other when it comes to hitting those milestones? However, some parents really do have legitimate bragging rights. Three-year-old Alexis Martin has just become the youngest person in Arizona to join Mensa, a club where members must have an IQ in the top 2 percent in the world. To put it in perspective for you, most people have an IQ of 100. Little Alexis scored a 160. It's truly amazing. Doctors say she is smarter than 99.9 percent of the world's population. However, it's not all good news for the little Einstein.

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    My two-year-old daughter might be what you call "high maintenance." She doesn't like to play by herself, talks a blue streak, and is constantly looking for attention. One of her favorite phrases is "Look at me," something she says before doing somersaults or splits or -- gasp -- diving off the couch because another one of her traits is absolute fearlessness. I've caught her staring at herself in the mirror and pretending to cry. She asks about a gazillion questions a day about everything. Ev-er-y-thing.

    The problem is her mom is also high maintenance. I made the decision this year to quit my full-time job and do something that would allow me to raise my daughter, but as a work-from-home parent, I require hours during the day when I can just stare at a computer screen. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't often wonder if a daycare worker would do a better job of "raising" my daughter than I am.

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    Have you ever looked over at your toddler and had a reaction along the lines of, "OMG, that's so disgusting, yet adorable!" or "I can't believe he just pulled that off!" -- in regards to whatever he happens to be doing?

    Little kids definitely seem to have a knack for looking all sorts of cute and sweet -- even if they happen to be doing something really embarrassing, gross, or a combination of the two.

    (Which is the case most of the time, if we're being honest.)

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    Growing up, my mom constantly warned me to be careful or I'd crack my head open.Yes, I learned, that nearly everything could end with me accidentally being maimed or killed. "Don't go too high on the swings, you'll fall and crack your head open." "Be careful playing on that icy sidewalk, you don't wanna slip and break your neck." "Stop leaning back in your chair, you'll..." "Don't run by the pool… Don't hang upside down from the monkey bars…"Though few, if any, of those things ever happened, I'm pretty sure the fear of these catastrophes scarred me for life. Which is why I swore not to sound so fatalistic with my own kids.

    Bwahahahaha.

    Oh sorry, that was me laughing because, well, the best laid plans ... and all.Now that my kids have a bit of independence, I've realized I rely on scare tactics and maybe some exaggeration to get many a point across. So, here's just a few things I've caught myself saying that will most likely send them to therapy later in life.

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  • 61 +SHARE

    Three options exist for me when my daughter needs changing, the car is too far, and there is no family bathroom. They include: (1) walking her by a bank of dangling adult penises, only to discover there's no changing table anyway; (2) risking arrest by entering a women's room myself; or (3) assigning a stranger to escort her inside, based on the theory that having female body parts makes one entirely trustworthy.

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    You know how everything changes when you become a mom? You spend nine months getting ready for this little person to enter your life -- you read the books, you set up the nursery, you oooh and aww over teeny-tiny newborn clothes ...

    And then they hand you the baby after going through what is likely to be the most physically demanding and painful experience of your life, and all you can think is -- holy crap, I made you!

    Well, we mamas might have made these kids, but they're the ones that made us moms.

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  • 62 +SHARE

    My two-year-old daughter knows 10 letters of the alphabet and may be outpacing her own teachers in that regard. At left is a scan of the top portion of the progress report my wife and I received from our daughter's preschool last month, I poop you not. It indicates that she received a thorough introduction to "famouse artist and there paintings."

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    I will never lie to my daughter. I remember promising this to myself. That was before we got her the "phone" that was really an iPod Touch. And before we started taking it out of her crib at bedtime, claiming that it needs charging. And before we told her that frozen yogurt was ice cream. Then there are the Top 3 lies we all tell our kids: (1) If you don't come with me now, you're staying here; (2) We're almost there; and (3) We'll come back tomorrow.

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    Catherine Duke was hanging out at a family-friendly restaurant recently with her young daughters, 3-year-old Ana and 2-year-old Emma. As a stay-at-home-mom, she frequented the restaurant as a way to get out of the house (raise your hand if you’ve been there, done that!) and was friendly with many of the employees there. Which is why what happened next is totally weird and not a little bit disconcerting.

    Emma suffers from an undiagnosed medical condition that has led to developmental delays -- including walking. She didn’t walk until she was 23 months old. Her orthopedist recommended shoes with extra ankle support, which squeak when she walks correctly from heel to toe. The squeaking bothered another customer -- and Catherine was asked to remove her daughter’s shoes or leave the restaurant.

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