My son has a case of IDWS (I Don Wanna-gota Skools). You know that illness that causes you to try any tactic to avoid the dreaded S-word?

Just today, he told me that he couldn't go to school because his stomach hurt ... and his leg ... and his elbow ... and he may have had a nasty hang nail .... REALLY? This is what you're going with? The old stomach/leg/elbow ache? Listen kiddo, I invented the 'sick' ploy and frankly, I expected more from you. So much more.

Look kids, don't act like you're disappointed too. I've got your number and I'm pretty sure my kid isn't the only one relying on such amateur techniques. Which is why I decided (as a seasoned pro) to give you youngsters some sound advice so you can stop embarrassing yourselves and make us proud.

These tips will help you gain your parent's sympathy and maybe even regain their respect. Good luck:

Moms I know are freaking out about the flu this year. With just cause too, as this flu season has been a doozy. People are dying, mayors are declaring states of emergency, and medical professionals are asking the public to please get vaccinated.

Children are especially susceptible to the flu virus -- 29 kiddos have already died this year from flu-related complications. One dad, Joe Lastinger, is particularly urging parents to vaccinate their children if they haven’t done so already. He knows what it’s like to skip it and regret it later.

Kids get sick a lot. Especially toddlers. They are exploring, putting things in their mouths all the time, sometimes they even like to lick things like shopping carts. It's terribly challenging to keep a kid from catching something. But there is something we as parents can do to prevent other kids from getting sick. You know, help another parent avoid a week of sleepless night, Stage 4 clingers, and crusty booger snot stains all over everything in the house. And that's to keep your kid cooped up in the house for the entirety of the sickness, and even however long after they may still be contagious.

And yet it's something so many parents don't do. Because that's damn near impossible. But the worse offense is actually letting your sick child play with other kids. Why, parents, why?!

Totally Okay Entertaining ThemselvesIt happened again. I was set to start my work day when a snotty, feverish toddler and random teacher development day at the kindergarten meant my previously scheduled adult activities were simply not going to happen. Usually when this happens, I panic, and then work something out so my husband and I can alternate work with child care. Did I mention on this particular day my husband was a couple thousand feet in the air headed to the other side of the country?

Needless to say, I was on my own. Fresh off a long holiday weekend, I had already exhausted all of my fabulous "planned" toddler and big kid activities, so I threw up my hands and declared that my children would be on their own. As I bent over my keyboard, I awaited the howls of, "There's nothing to doooooo," followed by, "He's touching me!!!" Yet, they never came.

There are things that are absolutely dreadful in life. But there is one thing that is worse than getting a bad haircut or a botched at-home Brazilian bikini wax or even your thumb falling off because you change channels with the remote too much. And that thing is when your kid gets sick. Nothing gets done. Your kid is miserable and it's so sad to see. And everything you own has snot on it. You become helpless -- nothing you can do can help your adorable little one from turning into a pile of frowny face mush. 

So as mothers we do what we have to do and we start pointing fingers. This is somebody's fault and you start counting back three days to when they were possibly exposed to this yuck and blame Grandma for not covering her mouth when she coughed, the kid at the playground who shared her granola bar, or your friend's kid who liked to pick boogers and feed them to your child. We blame, blame, blame.

Rule #1: Wear Them OutIt happens to the best of us. Those kiddos bring home pre-school germs and we get the sick twice as bad as those little buggers ever did. At least that's what's going on in our household and just in time for winter vacation! Just as I was about to throw in the towel, I stumbled upon the Barefoot Foodies sick parenting guide, which provides lots of entertaining options for you while you're battling the snots. And in spite of the NSFW -- or children -- videos, she actually did inspire me to teach my kids how to Dougie, while I sat on couch wrapped in a blanket.

These, and other tips got me through my worst sick day with two lively children. How did I do it? Here's how.

Moms, we're doing it wrong! According to a new survey -- let's bring the dads into this conversation, too -- we parents are treating our kids' fevers the wrong way. There's a big disconnect between how we think we should be treating a fever and what pediatricians actually recommend.

The makers of Advil® sponsored a survey that talked with 1,026 parents of children ages 12 years and younger and over 250 pediatricians nationwide. They found out that half of us (52 percent) feel anxious, fearful, and helpless when our kids get a fever. And almost all (94 percent) pediatricians think we need to be better educated about how to handle those panic-inducing fevers. Wouldn't it be great if you knew EXACTLY what to do about your child's next fever? Read on to see if you're treating your kids' fevers right.

After my long and sordid career as a mother (read: 10 years), I've ascertained that certain kids are prone to certain ailments. My eldest had a propensity toward lung issues. My baby, well, she was born with a neural tube defect. My middle son, Alex, oddly has had problems with his eyes.

From that description, you might think that he'd been born partially blind, or with a lazy eye, or is cross-eyed or something, and you'd think that I'm only capable of making weird kids. (Which is, in fact, true.) But in this case, it's a moot point. Because Alex's eye issues are all accidental.