The relationship between two of Tinseltown’s beautiful people has skidded into that special place in hell where bitter old love affairs go: scathing post-breakup hatred. In their latest installment of off-screen drama, Gabriel Aubrey has been investigated for child endangerment after he allegedly pushed the nanny while she was holding his daughter, and Halle Berry’s petitioning to move to France, which will make her joint custody arrangement conveniently inconvenient for her ex. Checkmate.

I, for one, think Halle needs to take a breather from romance. Just to get her head together. She hasn’t even gotten her old house in order and made respectable arrangements with ol’ Gabe and she’s off and running with a new dude, supposedly engaged to Olivier Martinez. (Which is also interesting since she swore up and down on several occasions that she’d never get married again. Eh, who can figure it out?)

Were you relieved when your kids finally got old enough where you didn't have to do the whole baby-proofing thing anymore? Yeah, me too. It was just so refreshing to finally be able to do simple things like lift the lid of the toilet seat without unlatching that stupid little clip or leave a handful of change on the counter without worrying that my son would eat it like candy.

I am done having kids, barring any unforeseen "slips," so my baby-proofing days are hopefully gone for good. That is, unless we decide to break down and get a dog. Those of you who have furry friends apparently need to worry about "pet-proofing" your homes even if your babies are all grown up. Looks like the whole "a puppy is worse than a baby" thing has more truth to it than we thought.

When you take little kids on vacation, you expect mishaps here or there -- a scraped knee, a fever -- but you never expect that your child might get attacked and dragged away by a hungry mountain lion! Maybe parents should be thinking a lot more about potential risks like these and go through life with some type of sharp blade. By now you may have heard about the 6-year-old boy who was attacked by a mountain lion while walking with his mom to their room at Big Bend State Park in West Texas, and if you haven't, I'm sure you just screamed WHOA! like I did when I first read the story. Of all the random, freaky things to happen.

Toddlers have the strangest little brains. The ideas they get are often unimaginable to the adult mind, and their outlook on the world bounces between the truly funny and the extremely frightening. 

They follow their passions and instincts, which often lead them into places that are both precarious and flat out crazy. Take Noah Jeffrey, a 3-year-old from Australia. The boy was recently found inside of a toy vending machine. He wanted a toy, and rather than get one the traditional way -- paying and playing for a turn at trying to get one -- he went for the sure thing, and climbed inside the machine after what he wanted.

Imagine this scenario: A child will not go to bed. Everyone is tired. But the baby cries and cries and no one is getting any sleep. The more the child cries, the more that child's stress levels go up, the more the parent is stressed out. Add to that the everyday things that make our blood pressure rise -- mounting bills, trouble at work, a disagreement with a family member -- and that scenario can lead to a person lashing out ... at the child.

We're always going to have these stresses. It's how we cope with these stresses that is key. Key in not having more victims of shaken baby syndrome because the little one won't sleep. We need to protect these children from being abused. Because the stats are alarming. It's been reported that child abuse in infants is a bigger threat than sudden infant death syndrome.

If you're anything like most new moms, you're probably concerned about things like whether or not you're messing up your baby's teeth by using a pacifier, the color, shape, and consistency of his poop, and whether or not you're ever going to get back into your skinny jeans again. Sound about right?

Now you can add one more worry to your list: Your baby may be a target for identity theft.. Yes, I'm serious. Some weirdo out there likely wants to pretend to be your 10-pound bundle of joy.

Another startling story of a teacher "disciplining" an autistic child through abuse has surfaced. Even with so many of these flooding the news, it's still unbelievable. Lillian Gomez, a special education teacher in Florida, put hot sauce on crayons to keep her autistic students from chewing on them. Because you know, when someone has a way of dealing with stress in a non-traditional manner, it can be fixed right up if you simply administer pain. Jeez, Louise. Where do they get these people?

More importantly, why do so many people who are in charge of special needs children think abuse is okay? And you know what? There are a lot who believe just that.

This is NOT a babyIf I had a dollar every time I heard a mom of my generation complain about grandmothers these days, I'd be able to maybe go to dinner a lot or something. It usually goes like this: I thought my mother/mother-in-law would be such an involved grandmother, instead she's off on a cruise every week and acts like she's doing us a favor by "babysitting" her own grandchildren. Or my personal favorite: My mother/mother-in-law is too busy recovering from plastic surgery to hang with the kids, and when she does come over she insists on being called "Glam-ma."

Yep, Baby Boomers are not turning out to be the best at nurturing their grandchildren. Or perhaps they're just the first generation of women to buck the traditional "grandma" role. But this 54-year-old grandmother just committed probably the worst grandma offense one could: She got loaded and left her 1-month-old grandson on the side of the road.

Hey, grandma's gotta get her party on too.