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Photo by stacy77
A warning: If you are in a store and see a toddler having a meltdown, screaming fit, tantrum, whatever ... do not, I repeat, DO NOT approach the mom to give advice or offer help or -- goodness help you -- ask her to leave the store.
Because you will likely get a look like this at right.
Chances are you know this already. But in case you're still new at toddlerhood, to help hammer the point home, here's a sampling of some of responses you might get along with those daggers. Maybe you could print this out and post copies at all your favorite stores ...
-- It is in your best interest not to get involved. I will be already aggravated and some nosy person not minding their own business will send me over the edge.
-- I would knock you on your a** if you walked up and told me to leave the store. I don't have a problem with a child screaming in a store because I don't know the situation.
-- My son has autism, and does this all the time. I hate when people come up to me when I'm trying to calm him down, asking if he's okay or if I need help. That's more annoying to me than my kid crying!
-- If some broad got in my face about my crying baby or my melting-down child, she should already have the thinking skills to know I'm not a happy camper at this point. I would most likely be telling her to get out of my face before I get her out of my face. I already have one brat to deal with.
Good vent, I needed that.
What do you do about screaming children in stores? Do you approach or keep your distance? Has a stranger ever come to you offering advice on how to handle your child's tantrum?
Comments (23)
I just usually look at the Mom and smile and I will tell them, "been there done that and I am certain if you come back in a few, we could be there again too" But only if she makes eye contact. My daughter has done it to me on several occasions and I just pretty much ignore her and it goes away very quickly, I personally don't care what other people think about my child have a screaming fit because if it bothers them I am certain they have never taken a toddler to a store before and have no idea what it's like!
I say something like peajewel... I commiserate, especially if the mom looks upset. It's nice for a mom to know that at least one person understands.
What do you do about screaming children in stores?
Seriously - nothing. What can I do? lol Especially if it's not my kid screaming.
Do you approach or keep your distance?
Neither - just keep on shopping as if I don't notice...lol
Has a stranger ever come to you offering advice on how to handle your child's tantrum?
Nope. And it's a darn good thing, because my reaction would have been very similar to those mentioned in the post. :-)
Children having tantrums in the store don't bother me in the least. I feel for the mom/dad, knowing how embarrassed they must feel in their efforts to calm their child down. I don't even glance in their direction. I keep doing my shopping. I know that when my daughter has her little meltdowns in the grocery store, I don't want people staring at me with judgmental eyes. Thankfully, her meltdowns only last a couple of minutes. And NO, I don't exit the store. I keep right on shopping.
I HATE when people just ignore a child having tantrum after tantrum in a restaurant (and sometimes store). My child has certainly thrown herself on the floor and bawled from time to time, but I'm talking about the kids who are on their third tantrum and mom is just going on with her meal. The rest of us do not want to hear your child crying.
I can deal with it in a store because you just keep going, it's not like a restaurant, where you're paying to be there and stuck seated next to them. I have seen parents completely ignore children in stores too, and keep walking. It's rude in my opinion.
Now if mom is trying to calm the child down or take care of the situation, then I can sympathize. Either way, I never approach the parent, it's not my place, even when it annoys me.
I don't see what's wrong with people genuinely asking if they could help. I mean really there would be nothing anyone could do to help, but I would rather have that then the nasty looks and "If that was my kid I would spank his ass!" Classy.
I think if you ignore this unknown kid having a tantrum that would be a lot better...you don't want this child thinking if they throw a fit in a store that she'll get all the attention from perfect strangers there....! I can see a little old lady coming up and doing this sort of thing (asking if you need help).
I think there's a difference between a child throwing themselves on the floor and a child who is seated in the cart, crying for one reason or another. When my daughter does this, I don't react. I don't look at her. I keep shopping. If her goal is to get attention, why should I give it to her. Like I mentioned before, her fits usually last 1-2 minutes. I'm certainly not going to leave the grocery store for a "mini-fit". I'd never get any shopping done!
If/when I see a child throwing a fit on the floor, I don't judge. I leave it up to the parents to decide how to handle their child.
Why would I do anything about someone else's child having a tantrum in the store? I have kids and I know how it goes. (I just thank my stars that it's not my child - for the moment...LOL) It sucks and it's embarrassing and to have someone come up and say something rude is not helpful. Anyone who has kids should understand and if they don't have kids and they say something, then what goes around comes around and one day they'll be the one with the bratty screaming toddler making them look like an ass in the store.
I don't mind hearing kids cry in the store because I know that it's what they do - maybe they're tired or hungry or whatever...taking toddlers anywhere is a grab bag, you just don't know what kind of a day they're gonna have. And I can't just sit at home all day in case my kid has a tantrum...I have to buy groceries, we have appointments to keep, etc.
if someone came up to me in regard's to my daughter crying. i would tell them to mind their own business. and i would say who are u god! i would also tell them i dont think u would like it if u were having ur own issue's in ur life and here i come intervening. its happened many times where i've gone out and heard newborns toddlers children crying. and i never even look cuz i know how embarssing it is for the parents. cuz i've been there many times. of course i try to calm down my child. sometimes if im with my husband and my daughter throw's a fit i'll leave the store with my baby girl and wait till my husband is done shopping. thankfully no ones every said anything to me. and if they ever do warning!~ lol