Does Your Babysitter "Love" Your Toddler?


jealous of babysitter

Photo by MattisMommy08

I'm in the process of trying to get a regular babysitter for my daughter. I've never left her with anyone but my parents and the idea of leaving her with a "stranger" makes me anxious for a lot of reasons. I want my little girl to be well-cared for and safe, but like a lot of moms, I'm afraid she'll end up liking her babysitter more than me. It never really occurred to me that it would be bad for the babysitter to love her back. Is it wrong if the babysitter "loves" my child?


Amy Jo at Philly Moms thinks so. Her two kids are in nursery school/day care twice a week, and Amy Jo was a little uncomfortable when she heard one of the teacher's aids tell Amy Jo's daughter that she loved her.

Amy Jo says she's protecting her kids from insincerity. "My oldest is only three and change, and I doubt he understands the difference between how his parents love him and how his teachers "love" him. I would hate for him to suffer any kind of hurt over this confusion."

Jeanne Sager over at Strollerderby disagrees. Her babysitter tells her daughter she loves her and kisses her every day when Sager picks her up, and Sager isn't bothered by that one bit. She writes, "I chose my sitter based on a number of factors—but number one was how she related to kids. I believe she loves my daughter. Not the kind of all-consuming love that I have for her, but a love that makes her take the kind of care of her that I'd want someone to take while I can't be with her."

As for me, I think it would be great if my babysitter loves my daughter. I want her to adore her and care for her and teach her and have fun with her and do all the things I would do. There's just one thing, of course: I don't want my daughter to love her back.

How about you? Do you feel comfortable with a non-relative babysitter telling your toddler that she loves him?

Read More >