Toddlers Who Swear (But Not on Purpose!)

Posted by Cynthia Dermody

on January 22, 2009 at 7:08 AM

Photo by happEmomof2

Funny toddler mispronunciations, from CafeMom's Toddler Moms group.

When we took my son to Red Lobster, my son told the waitress he would like some "crap."

My son will have on his "Cars" jammies with the picture of the Piston Cup, point to it, and say "Pissin Cup!"

When Lightning says, "I am speed," my son Kaden says, " I am peed!"

It was President's Day, and my son came home from pre-k to show me the "Mr. Ham Lincoln" hat and picture he colored.

My son calls his fork his "f**k."

We're still working on "clock." It comes out of my 2 year old's mouth without the "l".

We are trying to teach our son the name of our new president, but he says "Bama" instead of Obama. It's even funnier when he sees him on TV or the newspaper, because he will clap and say "look, look, Mama, it's Bama"!

The other day my son asked for "rooster doodles" -- he meant "toaster strudels."

I heard my daughter say as she started writing in her diary the other night, "Dear, Diarrhea."

When my 4 year old daughter was 3: "glubs" (gloves); "goodness snakes;" and "bite-a-man" (vitamin).

My 22 month old son used to call his paci an "ass."

My dd says "ass" for "glasses." It is funny when she says it in the store: "I want your ass, Mommy."

When my little cousin was 3, we were playing Candy Land. She grabs the directions and says, "I can't read the erections!"

++What hysterical or embarrassing things have popped out of your tyke's mouth lately?

About the author Cynthia Dermody

is The Stir's Managing Editor who has trophies in her home for her skills at the Irish Jig. She makes cupcakes with as many fattening ingredients as possible, doesn't comb her hair for months at a time, and was probably a faerie in a former life.

Filed Under: development & growth, language

Comments (31)

Silvertears1275

on Jan 22, 2009 at 7:19 AM

My daughter's babysitter taught her to call her pants "britches." But it never came out that way. More like "Momma! I love these new bitches!"

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Mommyofthree691

on Jan 22, 2009 at 8:04 AM

My 22 month old calls frogs f**ks. When she says sit it sounds like she said shit instead. When my three year old son says grass it comes out as ass. This one was kind of on purpose but still quite funny. At pizza hut one day my potty training son tells me that he needs to potty. I take him and my four year old to the bathroom. My son accidently peed on my leg. When we exited the bathroom he runs to my friend and screams that he just peed on my leg and this happens to be lunch rush by the way so the whole place is full of people and they all start laughing. Then my four year old pipes off with "Blade you jackass you're not suppose to tell everyone and of course everyone laughs even harder as my face gets even more red. Lol

melissabilliot

on Jan 22, 2009 at 8:05 AM

my god daughter say bitch in stead of ditch...and fuck instead of truck...

TXMOM1980

on Jan 22, 2009 at 8:43 AM

my nephew who is 2 calls sunglasses caca's

Jaxismyheart

on Jan 22, 2009 at 8:58 AM

my nephew used to call his fingers his niggers which eventually turned to ningers and then to fingers.. We were in a resturaunt one day and he was eating spaghetti and he held up his hand and said eww mommy nasty niggers...it was so embarrasing

RJSMOMMA

on Jan 22, 2009 at 9:01 AM

my son used to say monster truck quite fast when he was very young but it came out more thke Mother F**k

kelelalee

on Jan 22, 2009 at 9:18 AM

My DD sings ring around the rosie. But when she sings "ashes, ashes, we all fall down" it comes out "oh-sh**, oh-sh**, we all fall down." I can't help but laugh. Frogs and flags comes out Fu**.

RebekahsMommy06

on Jan 22, 2009 at 9:24 AM

When my daughter says "Chugga chugga Choo Choo" (which is ALWAYS since she likes trains, she'll say Caca Caca Choo Choo. It's quite halarious. She also calls her fingers "freakin". At least that's what it sounds like to us. She just turned 2.

Moomie

on Jan 22, 2009 at 10:15 AM

I have a great video of my now 4 y/o saying frog and it is hilarious. It of course sounded like he said f*ck. I LOVED it when he would shout out, "Look, F*ck mommy! F*ck!" in the middle of the store. *rofl*

L.a.u.r.a.

on Jan 22, 2009 at 11:55 AM

when my oldest was about 14 months old and I was 8 months pregnant with my second we were at the grocery store and everytime a man would walk past she would say "is that my daddy?"

ds pronounced truck as "f*ck" I was on the phone and he asked for his 'fire f*ck' and i told him I don't know it's at, and he decided to LOUDLY proclaim its location "my f*ck in playroom" the person on the other end was a little concerned with his language...

my middle daugther loved winnie the pooh but pronounced it 'poop' she had poop shoes, poop panties, and a poop doll. (it actually became habit for the whole family to refeer to the doll as 'poop') We had a guest over at bedtime and not even thinking about it I came out and said 'we can't find poop'