Mom Confessions: I Scold Other People's Kids

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hushIt's time for a Mom Confession -- because, let's face it, we're real mothers and sometimes it doesn't work the way the parenting books say it should.

This Week's Confession:

If a child comes in my house and starts breaking the rules, I'll scold them if their parents refuse to. I treat all children the same. I demand respect as well as give respect.

Case in point: My sister-in-law's daughter started swinging these heavy glass objects. Her great grandmother and great aunt told her to stop, but she kept doing it, and her mother was in another part of the house. So I sternly told her to put them down and said if you can't listen, you need to stop playing with them.

The girl threw them, screaming, and ran to her mom. Her mom told her, it's okay, you can play with them, and got mad that I scolded her child.

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Should moms be allowed to scold another parent's child?

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Total Votes: 630

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Do other parents (not a caregiver or babysitter) have the right to discipline your kid when you are not around -- either in someone else's home or a public place, or when the incident involves their own child?

We all have secrets -- so thanks to this brave mom for sharing her honest thoughts, and thank you for keeping this conversation non-judgemental!

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111 Comments

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criss... crissymlee

One of my bestfriends and I before she moved would hang out all the time. We had no problem telling each others kiddo to stop or stopping them from doing whatever even if the other mom was in the room. If I dont see my son do something hes not sposed to do but she does then tell him to stop! And when it comes to my fam... there really is no one who can't say "no" or "stop". But... there is a limit. No one can just spank him or create new rules that aren't everyday rules that are obeyed (hitting the dogs, jumping on the couch, spitting, etc) HOWEVER it has to be someone close to me... if any ole person decides to tell my kid what to do BELIEVE ME they will hear about it!

CJJoh... CJJohnson

I would have answered the first answer but... I don't condone spanking.

Itali... ItalianMomma04

I scold other peoples kids but only in certain situations. Like if they are in my home I will, if it involves my child, especially in a negative way, or being mean to my children/family members, however, if I am a guest in someones home and it's their child I try to keep my mouth shut, unless it directly involves my child being harmed or being influenced.

nonmember avatar miracle mama

"I do not spank or otherwise hit my children as a form of discipline and I would never place them in the care of anyone who thought that was okay."

Same here. If anyone hit my child I would press charges.

bluuskye bluuskye

I think the actual problem here is people not taking proper care of their children.  You should not raise your voice to someone else's child because the other parent should be taking care of the situation.  I would first call out the parent and ask if they will make sure their child does not behave in this manner.  Sure it will piss them off, but if heard enough times maybe they will realize that they need to take charge of the situation. 

chukuku chukuku

Hi,


I agree with the last optio about dependeing the surroundings. If its at my house then people should follow my house rules. If i see the mother taking care of the situation well then i wont say anything but mostly its at a point wen the kids dont listen to thier mother so then i would say something and so that im dont put anyone else in that situation i make sure my kid doesnt do anything in others homes or even my own.

Kathr... KathrynTBrown

Lets just say I'm not going to leave my kids alone with adults that I wouldn't trust to scold in a way I think appropriate. That goes for family, friends, and strangers. So yes, others can and should scold my kids but it should be done in a manner I would approve of. If my methods don't work for them then they can bring my kids back to me and say no thanks to watching them.

areaux1 areaux1

YES, YES,  YES!!  I don't play. If someone's child (that I'm familiar with) is acting up, I display the same discipline rules on those kids.  I don't mind spanking, time-outs, make them do chores, etc...


Now if I'm in a store I don't say anything to strangers, because their child may be just having a moment. It would irritate me to the MAX, if some stranger tried to put to test my motherly skills.  I would actually curse them out.  So I try and stay out of stranger's business, because you don't know people's reaction (not in this gun toting age). 

txmom... txmomoftwo

yes, if someone elses child is misbehaving they should be scolded, because in my childrens eyes if they see the  "bad" child is acting out and he is not being punished they will think it is alright to do it to. It is not right to let them go unpunished for doing the wrong/bad thing or else they will think they can get away with anything without being told it was wrong.

But_M... But_Mommie

I will correct my friends children verbally.  If I feel the behaviour warrents more direct action i talk to my friend and she handles the time out, spanking or what ever it is that they do.

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