7 Crazy Real-Life Excuses Moms Have Made for Being Late

LOL 22

late parking meterHere's a "secret" about me: I'm never early, I'm always late. I get too hungry for dinner at 8. I can't be bothered with people I hate. That's why ... hey!! Never mind all that. Ahem. Anyway. The point is, I AM always late -- always have been. (As my mother likes to remind me, I was even born two weeks late.) And as I'm sure you can imagine, that didn't change after I had kids -- in fact, my tendency toward tardiness only became more pronounced once I had a couple of small human beings with feeding/sleeping schedules of their very own to contend with. Um, sure, I'll be there in 10 20 30 ... I'll be there ASAP! 

Still. There is a silver lining to this particular mom brain deficit so many of us suffer from. Because while having kids makes it more difficult than ever to be on time, having kids also gives us a built-in series of seriously legit excuses as to WHY we're not on time. 

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The funniest part? Even though said excuses are usually, as I said, "legit" -- or, more to the point, "true" -- they're often so crazy that people (employers, childless friends, etc.) think we're making this sh*t up!! Here, in their own words, are 7 hilarious real-life excuses and/or anecdotes several (anonymous by choice) moms -- and one nanny -- have made for being late:

1. "Ok true story, I was getting ready to leave to meet someone and I was late because I couldn't find the baby! (My daughter) was at the crawling stage, and while I was using the bathroom, she crawled under her indoor slide, which had a fort under it, and she fell asleep in all the stuffed animals! I must have looked in there five times and didn't see her! I was so panicked!"

2. "I'm not a mom, but when I was a nanny, we ran late once because the 4-year-old I was taking care of insisted on doing the Fuzzy Wuzzy rhyme by herself perfectly before we could move on."

3. "Oh, and another time she had to check every storm drain on Nassau Street in Princeton for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles -- we were late that time too." (Same child as #2.)

4. "I literally once just looked at my boss who was mad about me turning in a late assignment and said, '(My son) ate my report.' He looked at me like I was insane."

5. "The twins were teething and we overslept and were an hour late for my cousin's wedding -- they were saying 'man and wife' when we walked in! I said the kids were up all night with horrible stomach bugs because teething seems like not that big of a deal!"

6. "Once, right before I left for work, my daughter was freaking out because we couldn't find the remote for the TV and she was obsessed with watching Elmo every morning. My nanny and I turned the house upside down looking for it -- finally we found it in the toilet!! When I got to work, I told my boss that my daughter hid my car keys. The Elmo thing sounded kind of ridiculous!"

7. "My son never remembers to brush his teeth. It's really embarrassing when we go to the dentist and he still has stuff from breakfast stuck in there! That happened one time and the dentist gave me such a dirty look, I said, 'Never again!' So the next time we were on our way to get a cleaning and I realized my son forgot to brush his teeth again, I turned that car right around and we went back home, where I made him brush and floss! We were really late for the dentist -- I said we had car trouble, because, obviously I couldn't tell him the truth!"

What's the craziest excuse you've ever made for being late?

Image via rickremington/Flickr

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fave82 fave82

Im late for work right now cause my sitter overslept ... Yeah not that interesting.

Rhodin Rhodin

When I make an appointment, I subtract half an hour from the time, like if it's at 10, I write down 9:30 and I tell everyone that's when it is.  Then, when I show up to the doctor with my two toddlers at 9:55, I look like a hero.

Coles... Coles_mom

Out of all the annoyances in the world, people running late are my biggest pet peeve. Start getting ready earlier! You have kids. You know you have kids. Plan accordingly. I have zero tolerance for anyone running late - barring maybe a car accident. Anything else is YOUR fault! I fire people almost immediately if they run late even once. Seriously can't stand it! I don't tolerate it from a friends or family either. I think it's a respect issue. As though you feel YOUR time is more valuable than my time even though plans/arrangements were made. I served in the military though. If you're early, you're on time. If you're on time, you're late.

nonmember avatar Sunflower

I actually agree with Coles mom here. I can understand being occasionally late, but always late is just unacceptable. Kids are not an excuse either.

Sarah... SarahHall58

I hate people being late too. I'm always early. There's something wrong if you're that late all the time. Plan better. Do things the night before if you have to. I don't tolerate lateness. At my job, if you're late, that means a patient isn't getting the care that you're supposed to be trusted with giving them.

the4m... the4mutts

Lateness is the WORST! My own dad is always 30 minutes late, everywhere he goes except work. I am habitually early, and very rarely EXACTLY on time or late.

I get my 4 kids ready an hour early, then we sit on the couch and watch tv so we dont get messed up hair/clothes before its time to go. That way, if there is a lost sneaker or whatever, 3 kids are on the couch ready to go, and all I have to do is take 5 minutes to locate a shoe, then we're out the door.

Shit happens, but habitually late people bug the hell out of me

Jespren Jespren

Coles-mom is right, being late is horribly disrespectful, it means you think your time is more important than some elses. I have 3 kids. I've nannied 2 ar a teen. I occassionally still sit 3 in addition to my 3. Doesn't matter. You know how long it takes to get ready, plan for it, and then leave. You don't let a 3 year old make you late because they can't find a remote, you don't let a toddler dictate your arrival because they want to take 15 minutes climbing into the seat by themselves, you don't hit your snooze button seven times because you were up all night with a teething infant. If you are absolutely unavoidably late (which should happen extremely rarely or it's not unavoidable) you call as soon as possible to advize the other person you'll be late and offer to reschedule if it works better for their schedule (or canc, stay late, etc) being habitually late is nothing more than a passive agressive way of being arogant.

JessL... JessLogansMommy

I'm usually on time, but the one that always seems to make me late is when one of the kids suddenly has to poop before we leave.  It's never a quick one either! I try to remind them 20 minutes before we leave the house but when you gotta go you gotta go! 

antfa... antfarmer101

I cannot STAND to be late. I hate waiting for other people so I do my very best to not make them wait for me. As far as I'm concerned, on time is 5 minutes late. So, with my two kids and my husband (who apparently can't tell time), if we all need to be somewhere, I tell them almost an hour early to start getting ready. It drives him insane, but at least then we get there on time without having to drive at the speed of light.

miche... micheledo

Colesmom, my dad always said that and I repeat it to my kids!!! :D

I am late now mor ethen ever, but it is still rare. With six kids, seven years and younger, it is a challenge. Sometimes just as we are ready to walk out the door, fifteen minutes early, the toddler gets into food and it is in his hair and clothes and he needs a quick bath and clothes change. Then the baby needs nursed or changed because of a blow-out. And an older child all of a sudden, loses a shoe. Sometimes, no matter how early I get up ,we just don't make it out on time.

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