15 Things Only Parents Say

Being a Mom 105

Last week, I told my son to finish his cheeseburger if he expected to eat dessert. I then laughed at the absurdity of having to finish a delicious, juicy burger before going on to chocolate. Oh, to be a child again. I find myself saying these things countless times a day: The things that would only make sense coming from a parent

Turns out I'm not the only one. Here are 15 things parents on my message boards have uttered lately, much to their dismay ...

1. DO NOT pee in the litter box!!!!

2. Let go of my nipple. It's not a handle.

3. Don't lick your brother.

4. Lamps are not swords.

5. If you blow (your nose) hard enough, I won't have to wipe it so much!

6. Don't put the dog toys in your mouth!

7. Girls don't like it when you touch their boobies. Mommy's boobies are only for the baby.

8. I don't care how many boogers you've got, please don't blow your nose on the couch.

9. You can't take your potty to bed with you.

10. No you cannot go play in the snow in your underwear!

11. Please stop trying to stick my glasses up my nose.

12. Please take your breakfast out of your pants. No! Don't. I'll get you another muffin.

13. Yes, sweetie, if you finish your piece of chocolate, you can have an orange.

14. The carpet is NOT toilet paper.

15. Please don't put any more crayons in the air conditioner.

What have you said lately that only a parent would utter?


Image via Scary Mommy

discipline, picky eaters, toddler development

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Rosas... RosasMummy

This morning I said 'don't wipe your tinkle and then your face with the same tissue, get a different tissue'

NatAndCo NatAndCo

Number two is a common one in my house, along with "no, don't pull on your peepee!"

MaryC... MaryCimino

My friend Kyle and I were at wal-mart with his mom when she yelled at random "QUIT SPANKING YOUR SISTER!" We were too embarrassed to be near her after that lol

short... shortone21

I am constantly telling my son to stop chewing on the dog. OR the variation get the dog out of your mouth.

gabe05 gabe05

Stop letting the dog lick your teeth!

Amy Hurtubis Mohr

i've told my son if he takes his medicine, i'd give him 2 oreos before the bus got there.


 

Brianne King

I often tell my kids, I don't want you to explain what your doing! I want you to stop doing it!

nonmember avatar Stephanie

" Stop humping the floor! " is a regularly heard request in my house.

nonmember avatar stacy

My 6 year old IM constantly telling him stop eating your boogers and the other day i had to tell him after an argument at the bus stop its not his job to pretend sell sticks cause the other kids didn't wanna play that game

nonmember avatar Jennifer

i end up telling my twins dont stick your finger in your brothers nose and then suck on your fingers

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