11 Cruel, Mocking Photos I Took of My Babies

LOL 79

I was going through some old baby/toddler photos of my kids recently, and I noticed something. Well, first of all, I noticed that my photos were way nicer before I started relying on my cellphone and blurry Instagram filters all the time, but I also noticed that there was a certain … theme to my pictures back then. You might almost describe it as photographic REVENGE.

Sure, I captured all the standard childhood milestone moments that I could (first smiles, first steps, first horrified reaction to rice cereal, etc), but I also seem to have taken a lot of photos of my children while they were upset and/or in amusingly compromised positions.

I'm sure I just thought the images were cute at the time, but now that I've been revisiting a bunch all at once I can't help wondering if I had ulterior motives. Such as, you know, GETTING MY KIDS BACK for all those sleepless nights and howl-filled days?

Here, take a look, you'll see what I mean:

Notice how even the dog is chagrined that I didn't immediately yank that snot-sucker out of my kid's mouth.

More from The Stir: Perhaps the Most Hilariously Unflattering Baby Photos Ever

Oh, sad baby curled in a ball of woe! Poor little Woe Ball, who I chose to photograph rather than comfort! (Caution: Woe Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds. Woe Ball contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at. Do not taunt Woe Ball.)

Hey good luck removing that Post-It, Mr. Manual Dexterity Skills Are Still a Work In Progress.


It could have been worse, is all I can say about this.

Look how much he loves his adorable frog raincoat! I SAID HE LOVES IT.

You still wake up sometimes, don't you? You wake up in the dark and hear the screaming of the lambs.

Look, I'm being meta-photobombed ... by Bobby Hill.

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Hee. Atlas Crawled.

Oh like YOU never secretly wished this would happen so you could go take a freaking shower already.

Do some parents instantly leap to their child's aid in these types of situations? Because obviously my first instinct is to 1) stagger around the room laughing hysterically, before 2) documenting the moment.

I wasn't present for this particular school photo, and honestly, I have NO idea what they were thinking ... but I can't lie, this one's a keeper.

Do you have a collection of embarassing/weird photos of your kids?

Images via Linda Sharps

toddler activities, boys


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Kaitlyn Pintarich

These are too hilarious! Thanks for sharing! I do the same thing, and now I even have him blogging on my blog @ ItsLearningTime.com. I'll be saving these memories for when he's dating! ~Kaitlyn

nonmember avatar badmommy

You are not alone! My two year old once unscrewed the light bulb from a lamp and had the threaded end in his mouth and was jumping up and down on his sister's bed when I walked in the room. Against my better judgement, I ran out for the camera and photographed it before removing the bulb. Bad mommy. But hey, at least it was a regular old incandescent bulb and not one of those mercury-filled fluorescent horrors...no potential mercury poisoning there, only facial lacerations from broken glass ;-)

Allis... AllisonWD

The "my hand is an effing cup" pic (and story) will always be one of my absolute faves!

nonmember avatar taylor

Hysterical! These Linda Sharper photo posts always make my day.

nonmember avatar Julia O'C

Thanks for starting my morning off with a laugh! I have a short video of my small son hysterically crying and running from an egg timer. You know tthose cute timers that looks like an egg with feet? Yeah. One of those. Years later and I still laugh when I see that video.

Nancy... NancyJ422

Yeah - hand in the cup and School picture are my favorites!  My son's 3 yr old school picture he was screaming hysterically 5 minutes before - camera comes out and he was a ray of sunshine!

Gavin... Gavins_mommy21

Love the Atlas Crawled photo!  One of the photographers I use told me, "you have to have at least one crying photo"...meaning the candid photos are the ones that are going to bring back the memories, not the perfectly staged photos.  My favorite photo of my first son was taken at the end of his 3 month photo shoot...he was sleepy and cranky so I handed him his little silky blanket.  As soon as I handed it to him, he rubbed his face allover it and stuck his little legs out...even though you cannot see his face in the photo it is my favorite because it just so sweet how he comforted himself...btw he still loves his blankets

the4m... the4mutts

Those are fantastic!! You will be so glad you have those when they're grown :D

I only have one crybaby picture of my 6y/o taken just 3-4 weeks ago. I wish I had thought to get pictures of their other misadventures lol

But thanks to you giving me the idea, I can start now ;)

Tonya Putnam

There are so many mishaps that I wish I had been able to document for all 4 of my kids.. Like my oldest shoving a ball of tinfoil up his nose (Think Arnold in Total Recall), or when he put a zip-tie on his finger, cinched it up tight and cut off the end of said zip-tip (that was almost a bad one), or when my daughter was walking backwards at an amusement park smarting off and falling on her back in front of about 100 people, or my youngest play biting my oldest, only to have his loose front tooth stick in my oldest's arm and get pulled out... the look on both their faces was priceless.


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