Potty training has got to be the worst thing about the terrific terrible 2s. Seriously. It's just so much pressure from all the other parents who have kids about the same age. Molly is potty trained! She wanted to do it even before she turned 2 1/2! Well la ti da Molly! My kids seem to think their potties are step stools so they can reach the sink and wash their hands. Yes, hand-washing has become a fun activity in my house. (Does Molly know how to wash her hands? Huh? Does she? Does she?) I kid. Sort of. My twins did show an interest in going on the potty a few months back. They sat on it. Clothed and with pants down. But there wasn't any action.
Now, like I said, they just use the potty for other things -- as a stool, a place for toy cars. When I was talking to my pediatrician about it, she told me something scary.
Never force them or make them sit on the potty to go, she told me. Not that I was, of course. She said that pressuring your kid to go on the potty could make them end up holding it and not going when they should, making them all constipated and backed up ... and um, if you are an adult and ever had that problem you know how horrible that is. Imagine how bad for a little kid?! My doc also said that if we try the potty seat on the toilet, instead of the free-standing ones we do have, to make sure they have a step stool that allows their feet to rest on when they are sitting. It helps ground the feet so they can go properly. Interesting.
All of this makes me think ... and I'll have to ask my mother, but I'm so very poo shy in public bathrooms that I wonder if there was ever some forced potty training going on oh-so many years ago. I swear since I've become a stay-at-home mom (TMI warning!) and am able to go number two in my own bathroom, I am much more regular.
Oh wait ... let's get back to the kids. I'll admit that I am totally fine with changing diapers. And if my kids aren't ready for potty time, they aren't ready. But I know they aren't going to be in diapers forever, so I'm not worried. It WILL happen. For now, I'm changing diaps, knowing that they grow up so quickly and I will cherish even these poopiest of times.
I'm going to call my mom now.
Are you worried about your child not being potty trained yet?
Image via Manish Bansal/Flickr
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Comments 40
My boys were trained at 4-5, but they are autistic, my daughter was potty trained at 3yrs old. I did not force the issue, with any of my kids. They were all slow to walk, 18months, so I just sat back and waited until they were ready. But once they were ready, they were ready and done in less than a week, for both night and day. I introduced the potty at 2yrs old and let them lead the way.
One thing that was made clear to us when DD was in daycare, by a Doctor that would give two conferences per month, was the fact that children's bodies have to learn to interpret the sphinter reflex, so they should not be forced, Some understand that a certain feeling means they must go potty or to urinate, but it is different in every child. The ones who learn very early, can still not be interpreting the signal and rather use the toilet as a novelty, but at the same time, learn how to pee or poo in them, and they might understand what their bodies tell them earlier.
As they say, they'll be ready when they're ready.
I should add DD was fully trained before 2 yo.... A cowrker's kid did it a little before 18 months,, so yes, it is very possible. There are specific cases where a child will take longer due to certain issues, but it is very possible to do it at a very early age, like as soon as they dominate walking, wich can be around 16-18 months on average.... ??
I had 6 kids and have no advice for you. Potty training is one of the hardest parts of parenting and boys are the worst. My two youngest were a boy, 2 years older than his sister. She was trained first. He wouldn't do it and I turned my attention to her and got her trained. One thing that worked was rewards. I bought a bunch of dollar store toys and wrapped them and if they went, they got a prize. You may think it excessive but when your 3 and 4 yr olds wont go, you'll do anything.
I don't know I began getting my ODD used to the potty early on by letting her sit on after naps and first thing in the morning very early just for a few minutes and if she went on the potty we'd cheer and if not fine maybe did that like 3 times a week when I had time no pressure. When ODD was about 36 months old she said Mommy I want to go peepee potty and that was pretty much it. The kid I babysay was much harder he didn't want to poop on the potty and I had to use prize driven incentives but still trained at a little over 3. I think that you don't have 100% control over anything you do with a child weather it be the potty, writting, reading, eating, etc but you just keep showing them a little at a time and eventually they get it. If you wait yeah of course eventually they'll wonder why no one else is wearing diapersand go on the potty but unless if you never expose them to it I think it's kind of lazy. I don't want to make anyone feel bad but having kids i not about sitting back, making sure they don't kill them selves and waiting for them to figure it out. You need to take control over your childs learning and expose them to the things you want them to learn how ever I'm no Dr.
With my oldest due to injuries that delayed his development he was five before he was not having accidents. The other three were all potty trained by two years. Now that being said my daughter who never had accidents at night now has to wear a pull up at night and has for the past two years. She started to have seizures two years ago and started wetting the bed every night.
My second oldest has always wet the bed (hes 14) and has to take medication every night, we brought him to a specialist when he was three as we noticed he was going to the bathroom every 15 to 20 mins. We found out he his bladder is/was the size of a 10 month olds. Even today he has to have doctors statement at school so he can use the bathroom as often as he needs to.
I think it's best to just go with the flow. If your child is ready, they will do it. My daughter was around 2 before I started getting serious about potty training. Before then, I just brought her in the bathroom to dink around with me while I went, so she got a vague concept of what the purpose of going in to the bathroom was. One weekend, I had had enough of changing diapers, and she was taking an interest in going potty, but still having accidents/wearing diapers. I took away her diapers, didn't let her wear pants (she loved that! lol), and gave her her 'big girl' undies. One weekend, she was fully potty trained, night-time and all. I just pulled her in to that bathroom every half hour to an hour, and gave her the chance to go potty if she needed, and when she did produce results, she got to put a big beautiful sticker on her sticker chart! :D
I now have my middle son coming up on 2 and this seems like it's going to be a bit more tricky. He has been ready to use the potty for a LONG time, but dad is usually at work, and I am not as good about getting him in the bathroom with me as I was with my daughter. And...I don't know what to do about the peep thing. lol. But anyway, it'll happen, not worried about it, just looking forward to no more diapers!
Good luck to all the moms with your potty training adventures! <3
That should say IN one weekend. lol. We called it 'extreme potty training weekend'. xD