You've seen the Time magazine cover that's been burning up the Internet, right? I'll admit it, my first reaction was to recoil from the image. It seemed deliberately provocative and shocking, and I chalked it up to a clever marketing technique to sell more magazines.
Of course, plenty of people don't think it's shocking at all, and in fact, they're pretty offended that ANYONE would be taken aback by the photo. So then I started feeling like maybe I was a bad person for raising an eyebrow at an innocent image of a mother and child … but then I remembered a somewhat similar nursing scene from Games of Thrones that everyone agreed was shocking.
So: extended breastfeeding! Why are we so disturbed by it?
Speaking personally, I find it nearly impossible to look at an older nursing child in the same way I might observe a nursing baby. I'm not saying it's right, but to me breastfeeding just looks very, very different when a child is old enough to make himself a sandwich to go with that drink. The bigger a child is, the more it can start to look cringe-y and awkward.
The Time cover seems like it was set up to exploit the things about extended breastfeeding that make us uncomfortable—the boy is standing on a chair, which makes him appear even taller, and he's wearing a little tough-guy outfit that highlights his age. Meanwhile, Mom is showing off her attractive figure while staring down the camera lens, and can we talk about the airbrush treatment she got on that underarm of hers? No one's armpit is that smooth, people!
Photoshoppery aside, the image is clearly intended to evoke the "extreme attachment parenting" concept of the article tease, and if it was meant to create buzz and ultimately drive more web traffic and magazine sales, well, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
In reading all the chatter about the Time photo today, I thought of a particular scene from last season's Game of Thrones. Check it out:
I'm not saying this is an apples to apples comparison, because, well, there's a bunch of craziness going on with the Lysa Tully character and her son is a dangerously spoiled little shitweasel. Still, the visual impact of a 6-year-old nursing is obviously freaky. I mean, even the other characters in the scene are like, uh, whoah.
So is this just a cultural thing? Is it horribly close-minded to be a little ooked out by older kids who breastfeed? Is it okay for a 4-year-old but less okay for a 6-year-old? (Because I sure don't remember anyone defending that Game of Thrones scene as depicting a perfectly normal feeding activity.) And do you think the response to the Time cover would have been any different if that child was a little girl?
Why do you think some people are weirded out by images of older kids breastfeeding?
Image via Time


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Comments 31
for me what was odd about the Game of Thrones scene was the fact that it isn't her kid and it's not real. The mom breastfeeding on time is kind of funny and cute in an in your face kind of way. Also 3 and 6 are vastly different ages.
The only image that weirded me out about extended breastfeeding was a 12 year old girl breastfeeding still, and that.. bothered me, a great deal, because then it turns into slightly creepy.
Still, this photo is in bad taste. Public breastfeeding is one thing, taking family pics is another one thing, but putting the photo on the cover of a national magazine is going over the top. And clearly being used as contraversy to sell more mags.
However, just as bad, are the descriptions of the photo using words like "creepy", "sick", "disgusting". Even worse, are those calling this picture child porn. Seriously, anyone finding this pornographic, is themselves sick and depraved, and says volumes about their character.
Look, I believe that women can and should breastfeed anywhere they want for however long they want. I'm comfortable with it, and plan to breastfeed all of my kids. My own personal comfort level to nurse with my own kids is 2. After two, they just don't seem like babies to me. But if someone else wants to do it, it's fine. My visceral response to this one is how that kid looks a lot older than three on the cover. I'm sure he'd look different not posed, dressed and lighted like that. I had to realize he was standing on a chair and that was baby fat, not just chubby kid fat to get it. I saw his age and breathed a sigh of relief. Not weird anymore, but it did shock me at first. But I don't see a problem with the shock either, our culture expects preschoolers to be growing up and moving away form things associated with babyhood. Whether that's right or wrong thinking is up to you, but that's why the shock was there. Can't comment on the boy or girl thing.
All I gotta say is, GROSS!! What the hell is going on? So, now you're a good mom only if you breastfeed your kid until he goes to middle school? I liked your sentence about the kid being old enough to make himself a sandwich to go along with the drink! Really?!
There's nothing wrong with breastfeeding but I don't want to see another woman's breast hanging all over the place especially when I'm with my own children. No I don't want you to hide in a bathroom, or go to the roof of the building just a small cover up is nice. When I was the children section of the book store a woman lifted her shirt and bra then started to breastfeed her child. Nothing wrong except for about 30 seconds her boob was just hanging out for all the men and small children to see. Get a wrap or go somewhere private. I think the magazine cover is just another example of how people are fueling the breestfeed or bottle debate.