Now, I know -- the woman is clearly a saint. She adopts kids from around the world. She works tirelessly to bring to light all of the horrible monstrosities that occur around the world. Honestly, we should just rename her "Mother Teresa" and be done with it all.
I want so badly to love her, and yet...I can't.
Here's why.
1) She makes parenting look too easy. Parenting would be a HELL of a lot easier if I had the help of 9273 nannies and live-in chefs.
2) She's dating Brad Pitt. *I* want to be dating Brad Pitt. She should let the guy go so the rest of us have a shot at making it with him.
3) I actually believe Angelina Jolie should be nominated for sainthood. She makes running my measly non-profit seem almost...cute. Pathetically cute.
4) Her pillowy lips could easily smack me when I walk into a room. My own thin lips can barely smack themselves.
5) After birthing 26473 children, her boobs should not be NEARLY as perky as they are. Mine? They look like two oranges in tube socks.
6) She looks beautiful rolling out of bed in the morning. I look beautiful if you're wearing beer goggles and the room is dark.
7) She weighs 98 pounds and could still kick my ass.
8) She weighs 98 pounds AFTER bearing 826437 kids. My arm, after popping out three kids, weighs 98 pounds.
9) I'm still bitter about the Brad/Jen breakup.
10) I'm terrified to travel with three kids to stay at a hotel - she's always carting her 82747 children around the world.
Image via cliff1066/Flickr
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Comments 66
I hate her because everyone that first hears my name says, "Oh, like Angelina Jolie?". DID YOU HEAR ME SAY "UH" AT THE END OF MY NAME? It doesn't help that my hair is black.
i hate her cuz shes a homewrecking whore
I dislike her BECAUSE she adopts children from around the world like butterflies, takes them out of their culture, changes their name and disrespects other woman by sleeping with their husbands. She is NOT a role model of any kind and should not be `celebrated'.
Sounds like you need more self esteem and confidence!
I'm hotter than her, hands down, b/c I love myself! And who needs Brad Pitt? My DH is AWESOME and hot, too!
lol.
I do still dislike her for the whole breakup, thing. But, if Brad was willing to leave for her, he would have left eventually. It didn't affect me personally, but I won't make them role models no matter how long they last.
Brad and Jen aren't the first casualties... Billy Bob was living with (and I think engaged) to Laura Dern, who was away for work and came home to find him out on the town in public displays with Angelina.
Billy Bob is no prize either and just really creepy.
How could you forget her weird incestual fling with her step brother? Or how about when she used to wear a vile of billy bob's blood around her neck? OR how she hates her father for what she essentially did herself (in regards to the Brad/Jen breakup)?
She does a lot of good things, don't get me wrong. But there are plenty of legitimate reasons to dislike her that have nothing to do with her looks (which I'm pretty sure would be viewed as "average" if she weren't famous)