Stephen Colbert Makes Me Want to Give My Kid Coffee & Cigarettes (VIDEO)

LOL 23

colbert babyccinosLook who just got hip to the Babyccinos trend: Stephen Colbert. And he loves the idea so much, he gave it a "Tip of the Hat" on his show last night!

Stephen thinks "hooking babies up on the foam dragon" is a mighty fine idea, considering how impossible it is to get babies up in the morning. I know, right? Baby needs caffeine to get ready and out the door in time for that play date.

In fact, Stephen thinks anything we, parents, do every day, our kids should do every day, too! Like smoking "Virjunior Slims" cigarettes with their babyccinos.

virjunior slims
Gosh how cute, Baby's first ciggies!
Now that we're talking about things parents do every day that our toddlers should do, too, I'm starting to get some great ideas. Like, maybe we should take our toddlers into therapy with us, right? I think all elite preschools are requiring new kids to be both potty trained and to have their Oedipal complexes resolved before they're admitted. The pressure!

And why stop at coffee? I mean, if Mommy needs a vodka, maybe baby does, too. Did you ever think of that? It's really, really hard figuring out how to talk and walk and making sure that every time you throw your food off your high chair tray, it really will hit the ground. Exhausting work!

I was going to come up with some other outrageous examples but I'm kind of hitting a wall here -- because everything else I can think of already exists in real life. Video games for toddlers, check. TV shows for toddlers, check. Dance clubs for toddlers, check. Board book versions of classic literature, check. You know what, Colbert? We're way ahead of you, baby.

Do you agree with Stephen Colbert's logic that anything we parents do, we should have our kids do, too?

 

Image via ColbertNation

in the news, toddler development

23 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

ofthe... oftheshire

Oh wait! You took him seriously?!? Now that's funny!

jayde... jaydensmom1726

the coffe thing maybe but not the other stuff.this guy is on crack when it comes to the booze and baby cigs

Carol Morgan

I hope she knows hes a comic, and anything he says is Satirical. So yes, I agree why the heck cant my kid have a cup of joe and read the morning newspaper?


 

Loref... Lorefield

<<the coffe thing maybe but not the other stuff.this guy is on crack when it comes to the booze and baby cigs>>


You know what's messed up? I mean, besides the fact that you had no idea this was satire? 


The fact that you actually think babycinos might be ok!

Mama2... Mama2MonkeyBoys

Jesus H. Christ are you still on this Babyccino kick? It's warm foamy milk with whipped cream and sprinkles, for crying out loud. Even if it includes a dollop of decaf, it's like 1g of caffeine that they're getting. Once in a while, allowing your child to eat something other than organic, farm fresh, whatever is TOTALLY OK.

I laughed when Colbert did this bit, but I'm just rolling my eyes at you.

femal... femaleMIKE

My child will not be having any alcoholic beverages  with me.   I will be needing him/her to mix it and serve it to me.

jesis... jesistar6910

LOL...who takes this seriously? 


He's a satirist, a trickster, comedian, funny guy, etc. This is not news, it is intended to get laughs - and I laughed my ass off. 

mcr17 mcr17

HES A COMEDIAN FOR A REASON

Jo41 Jo41

I love Colbert! So funny

11-20 of 23 comments First 123 Last