Toddler Bites Head Off Snake -- And 10 Other Scary Things Found in Toddlers' Mouths

Say What!? 58

corn snakeThis week a mother in northern Israel found a snake's head in her toddler's mouth. Thankfully the child had not been bitten or harmed while beheading that snake! But here's the part that makes me want to scream: They couldn't quite identify what kind of snake it was because its head was so chewed up. OMG! NO! Chewing a snake's head -- that is the worst!

Or is it? Even the most watchful mom has found crazy, disturbing, and revolting things in our kids mouths. I know I have. I've seen rocks, coins, glitter, a random bottle cap -- well, maybe I should just stop there. I asked some of my friends what crazy items they've found in their toddlers' mouths. Are you ready? Okay, let's go there.

Before we get started I just want to assure you all that all of these children are still alive and all of these parents are responsible and sane. Well, as sane as you can be after raising a toddler. Anyway, the following stories are as told by the parents.

E was crawling around at church one time and I saw he was gnawing on something. When I fished it out of his mouth it turned out to be SOME OTHER KID'S DISCARDED BABY MOLAR. I would find it funny now, but as a first-time mom it gave me the dry heaves.

My friend's daughter pried old gum from between the rubber mats at the park and popped it right in her mouth.

Half a matchstick. While in her crib. 3 marbles. The last bite of an unidentifiable lawn mushroom at a vacation rental in the middle of nowhere.

First time playing at the beach, age 2, E took a seashell, scooped up a big hunk of wet sand and shoved it right in her pie-hole. Another time, same age, she found and (possibly) drank an unknown amount of a rum & coke that had been left within her reach. Horrified, I watched her like a hawk for symptoms of drunkenness. Turns out symptoms of drunkenness are identical to symptoms of being 2 years old, so we'll never know. And then there was the gum that got poop on it... *shiver.*

When J was a bit over 1, he figured out how to open his bedroom door for the first time. I used to nap when he did, and while I was sleeping, he managed to get into the kitchen, pull out the rest of his dad's beer (from the trash - a 40 oz bottle I might add) and when I woke up (had a bad feeling -- seriously, there was NO noise. I woke up freaked) I found him in the kitchen, under the table, drunk off his ass and eating the cigarette butts outta the ashtray and playing with a broken glass. Can we say not only bye bye to Momma's naps, but most of her sanity that day? It STILL to this day gives me the shivers and he'll be 18 in 6 months. Oi. *shudder*

My dog's hair but I think we're just getting started.

Used cat litter.

Goose poop

Honestly, how does anyone manage to live beyond the age of 3? I ask you. Many thanks to the parents who shared your stories!

What horrible things have you pulled out of your toddler's mouth?


Image via goingslo/Flickr

confessions, in the news, safety, toddler health


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

Mandago Mandago

I'd like to know what kind of parent drinks forties and smokes in a house with a toddler.

Elise... Elise_Gurrola

omg those are good. when i was 3 my parents and uncle went outside because there was a fire down the street. they went to see what happened and left me with my uncles iguana. well i bit the head off of him. i still cant live that one down.

Lebel... Lebelle93

My son went into my dads box of recycalable beer bottles and drank the bottom fuzz. Uhm bottle caps. Tums. Cigg clips.. Its been..pretty gross in the one and a half years of being a parent.

craft... craftycatVT

I guess when I was about 2 yrs my sister won a goldfish at a fair. The next day, my mom gave me a pickle. A couple of minutes later, she found me alternately taking bites of my pickle and stirring the goldfish bowl with it. The goldfish didn't make it. I still feel bad about it even though I don't remember it.

Boobo... Boobookittt74

Omg that Is so gross!! Toddlers are pretty gross in general but the snake head. Ugh

Waag Waag

The worst had to be when my son was 8 months old and I layed him down for a nap came back to check on him a little while later he had stripped completely naked and was eating the contents of his poopy diaper. The worst part is he has done this more than once since then. It's extremely gross! He finally quit doing that

But now he thinks grass and the wood chips at the park is good which wood chips at the park have other kids hair and nasty stuff in. He also likes to find every little peice of dirt on any floor and put in his mouth before we notice he has it. 15months and it's finally getting a little better.

Misteh Misteh

@gottalovemal- my first was like that, my new baby on the other hand thinks you have to taste the world. I caught her licking the neighbors pet cat when it walked by.

phren... phrenicfire89

*sigh..* I have 10 month old twin boys, and already I am grossed out. 

1. roaches 2. TP from the bathroom trash 3. used litter + the poop (stop making poop shaped treats GERBER!!!) 4. cat food 5. Daddys dirty sock 6. one of their peed or pooped on socks 

Twin B always has something in his moutha nd more than half the time its unidentifiable. They are only 10 months lol, oi.

ivego... ivegotrhythm

My son was 3 and facsinated with the fish at preschool so we got him a beta. He named it Flower and it lived in a bowl in his room.

One day,after I put him down for a nap and went to my room to nap a bit myself, my son comes running into the room, crying and shaking and very obviously distressed. He cried "I ate Flower! !" And sure enough, he had bitten that fish clean in half. I never did find the other half. I assume he swallowed it.

He was really upset but needless to say we have very few animals here now smaller than a pony.

nonmember avatar Jessica

ICY HOT my son loved anything that had a perfume smell or eucalyptus scent. Hello poision control this Fischers mom again......

11-20 of 58 comments First 12345 Last