10 Reasons I Loathe Other Kids' Birthday Parties

Jill Smokler
Being a Mom
33

I love birthdays. Having an entire day all about you is simply wonderful. The very best day of the whole year! Except when it comes to the birthdays of other people. Namely, the friends of your children. Those birthdays? Kind of suck. Here's why ...

1. Goodbye, weekends. Whatever happened to spending weekends doing what you want? Oh, yeah, they ended with children.

2. Inconvenient timing. The newest thing around here is to have parties on a Saturday night from 6-9ish. The free babysitting is genius. I love it. But, the parties that are in the middle of naptime? Kill me now.

3. The sugar highs. Sure, have my kid run around and then load him up with cake and candy and give him back to me. That makes sense.

4. The presents. With the number of parties we go to, I could easily fund a severe shoe shopping habit with what I spend on presents. Sadly, I don't. Because now I'm broke.

5. The party favors. The dollar store junk that is given out inevitably breaks and is the cause of major meltdowns. Each and every time. Can we just skip this part?

6. Blowing out the candles. Never before had this tradition struck me as odd, but seeing snotty kids spit all over a cake about to be consumed by my children rubs me the wrong way. Who thought of that?! I'll skip my slice, thank you very much.

Mommy and Me parties. If the kids aren't old enough to comprehend what a birthday actually is, can we skip the whole celebration altogether? A cake at home is more than sufficient.

8. The Jump Zone. I get it: It's the easiest option out there. But, it's loud and chaotic and it smells like feet. If I never had to step foot in there again, it would be too soon.

9. Chuck E. Cheese. Enough said.

10. The drop-off. I am a huge fan of drop-off parties once kids get to a certain age. A huge fan, that is, until we are the party hosts. Then, I'm in hell.

What about you? Birthday parties -- love 'em or hate 'em?

 

Image via Jill Smokler

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