Should Mom and Dad Fly Solo in Case of a Crash?


paper airplane crash
Flickr photo by Old Sarge
Soon after I had my baby, I had these two thoughts:

  1. I can never die.
  2. I can never get divorced

Of course, I never really wanted to do either one of them before I was a mom, but having a child made them much more of an imperative. So I'm trying my best to avoid both -- which brings me to flying.

I love to travel, but hate to fly. I've always considered it something I needed to do to get me from here to there, white knuckles and all.

Since my daughter was born a little over two years ago, we've taken some family trips and my husband has made some trips on his own, but my husband and I have never flown together without our daughter. I'm not so sure I want to.

I look at it like this: If we fly as a family and the plane crashes, short of a miracle, we'll all die together. If my husband or I fly somewhere alone and the plane crashes, at least my daughter will have one of her parents left to care for her. But if my husband and I fly together without our child, and the plane crashes, she's an orphan. That's big on my list of not-to-dos.

Sure, our chances of dying in a car accident are far greater, blah, blah, blah. But I hate flying. It scares me. And the recent plane crashes in India and Libya and Afghanistan rocked me to the core.

I know of at least one couple who never flies together to avoid orphaning their three children in the event of a crash. My husband and I don't have any trips sans the kid planned in the near future, but it's something I'm thinking about. If we do go somewhere, I'm considering booking us on separate flights.

Do you and your partner fly together without the kids?

a mom's life


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

nonmember avatar texascupcake

I have heard of this before and since time has settled that argument for my beloved and myself,{ I was divorced after 37 years]It was a worry that we should not take seriously. My sister-inlaw and her husband took separate planes and I look at it this way. There are just so many crashes that happen in a year. By taking separate planes coming and going, you really INCREASE your chances of a mishap since your adding 2 more flights to you plans, whereas, by flying the same plane, you are gutting the law of averages DOWN by limiting thebad number of flights to worry about.

jeann... jeannesager

My husband simply refuses to fly -- so we don't fly separate OR apart!

Julie... Julieryanevans

Suzanne, we have the exact same philosophy--if we're all together fine, but never both parents together on the same plane. my parents always did it that way when we were growing up, and it made me mad that they thought there was that strong of a possiblity of them dying, but now as a parent, it's the only way i'll fly.

RanaA... RanaAurora

I personally find it ridiculous.

nonmember avatar texascupcake

lugeAnother thought, early in my marriage, when we went on a trip, the plane was delayed and we had to get off and wait for repairs. I immediately got off the plane and bought very high life insurance, and said well, at least everybdoy will be crying with a pot of gold to ease the problem. Whgroup hugat's the chance your kids will hit the mutli million jackpot?

Jesse... JessecaLynn

I think i would be more worried about being apart from each other.  As much as I love my children, I also love my husband very much.  I would rather be with him and die together than for one of to die without the other.  I have family that if something did happen to both of us, they would care for our children with all the love that we have for them.  Look at 9-11, 4 planes all crashed at about the same time, being on seperate planes isn't any safer.

Cafe... Cafe MicheleZ

I have a crippling fear of flying so this makes sense to me. Though I just don't want to fly anywhere ever. And there was the story of a family of four who traveled separately, just by happenstance, and one plane crashed with one parent and one child in it (they died) and the other plane with the other parent and other child had no incident. It was that Air France crash from Rio to Paris a few years ago.  (Yes, I follow plane crashes.)

sodapple sodapple

we haven't gotten the chance to travel together on planes but the day that it will happen, i'll think twice about flying together.

Lokis... LokisMama

I've flown once, and my DH won't fly at all (he's terrified of any heights, and also terrified of flying), so it's not really an issue. 

1-10 of 13 comments 12 Last