
Flickr photo by laffy4kMy 2 1/2-year-old son, JD, is quite the artist and normally I'm in awe of all of his creations -- when they're on paper! The other day I caught my little guy scribbling in crayon on the WHITE windowsills in the living room.
"STOP," I said in a very calm, even-toned voice. JD stopped, looked at me, and offered up the orange crayon. Then he said,"Sorry" in a very pitiful voice and his bottom lip curled under. He knew he did wrong, and according to a recent study at the University of Iowa, this is a very, very good thing.
Research finds that toddlers who feel guilt and regret over the naughty things they did (scribbling on the windowsill; pulling the cat's tail; throwing peas on the kitchen floor) have fewer behavioral problems later on than toddlers who didn't recognize their own, let's be honest, everyday mischief.
Some mom-to-mom advice: Like I said, JD knew what he did was a big no-no. If you find that your toddler isn't owning up to (or understanding) his "uh-oh" behavior, try talking to him in a calm, never angry voice. Show him the scribbles on the windowsill and say, "No-no." Tell him that coloring on the windowsill makes you sad (show him a sad face). Lastly, never, ever try to explain something when your child is crying or throwing a fit -- he won't be listening, trust me.
Does your tot understand his naughty behavior? Do they say sorry when they act up?
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Comments (2)
I hear "I'm so sorry momma" everyday. When my 3 year old gets into trouble for something she usally apologizes right away.
saying 'I'm sorry' as a reflex can become a VERY bad habit in adult hood. As toddlers, saying I'm sorry can seem to erase any bad behavior without discussing or understanding or owning it. "I'm sorry" does not accomplish anything if it's perceived as a Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card...
good luck to us all.