POSTS WITH TAG: sex

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    Sex is a huge part of all of our lives anyway you look at it. Whether you are getting it (or not getting it), we all think about sex an absurd amount. But not all of us are doing it right.

    Oh, I know, we THINK we are. Like Mel Brooks once said: "Sex is like pizza. Even when it's done bad, it's still pretty good."

    The fact is, most people over-think sex. There seems to be this popular notion out there that you need to have everything just right -- the right toys, the right mood, the right music -- just to get a little nooky. In fact, the whole thing could be greatly simplified with just a little creativity and ingenuity.

    It's just sex! With that in mind, we trolled the Internet for the best sex tricks that don't require a major investment of time or money. We found 10 sex hacks so hot, we know EXACTLY what you'll be doing tonight. And that's the idea.

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    Can we all just agree that men are big babies? And I'm not just talking about how they act when they're sick -- the "man cold," if you will. I'm talking about how they act in the bedroom when we have our periods.

    I can't tell you how many times I've had guys ask me to do some crazy, weird stuff between the sheets, only to have them freak out when they find out my monthly "friend" is paying a visit.

    Look, I get that some women don't feel comfortable having sex when they have their period. That feels different somehow. But if you're okay with it, shouldn't your partner be too?

    Here's why men really need to man up when it comes to period sex.

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    "Married sex is boring." We've all heard that tired cliche, haven't we? It's not the same once kids get into the picture. The attraction fades and becomes tedious. Blah, blah. You know what's really drab? That attitude.

    Because if you think married sex is "boring," then you are doing it all wrong. Married sex is anything but stale. You know that old saying "you can't step in the same stream twice"? In no other part of life is that more true than in marriage.

    It's constantly evolving, ever fluid, and after 11 years of marriage and 14 years together, I can say quite honestly that we have never had the same encounter twice. Not once. Every time we find some new move, some new mood, some new angle, some new words, to change it up. It's not always hot and heavy -- sometimes it's quick and dirty, in fact -- but it's always, always different.

    And that is married sex in a nutshell. You are different people every time you come together. How "boring" is that?

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    When you look at yourself in a full-length mirror, what's the first thing you feel? For a lot of us moms, it's a combination of fear, disappointment, and longing. Maybe we're not seeing the body we want to see. We're not as slim and toned as we'd like to be, or maybe the baby has caused some of your curves to sag.

    It's hard not to pick yourself apart as you stare at your reflection -- and it's hard not to let those feelings affect your sex life.

    But you know what? Sex and relationships expert Dana B. Myers is here to help. The thing is, you don't HAVE to stand in front of the mirror and feel that way. Myers has a great trick for turning that moment around into something that makes you feel sexy and sensational: Take that body part you usually disparage, and tell yourself how sexy it is. As in, "I LOVE my big, sassy butt. It's so hot!"

    Myers demonstrated how to do this in a fun video she did with us. See for yourself!

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    When have you ever heard of a guy saying, "Oh, I'm getting too much sex from my wife, I'd better divorce her"? Well, in the "this might be the first time in the history of the world" category, an Indian man filed for and was granted a divorce from his wife by the Mumbai family court because of her unrelenting demands for sex.  

    According to The Times of India, the man first approached the court in January 2014 claiming his wife was "aggressive and autocratic with an insatiable appetite for sex." Oh, and she apparently forced him to take medications to help him with his sexual performance when not plying him with copious amounts of liquor. The man stated that he was working three shifts at his job and just didn't have the energy to come home and please her as well (cry us a river). 

    Now granted, we're poking a little fun, but this case did raise some serious questions, like what would happen if a woman tried to use the same claim as grounds for divorce?

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    It sounds quaintly old-fashioned, but not too long ago phone sex was very much hot and happening. Sexting may be all the rage right now, but there's something incredibly intimate and exciting about actually hearing another person's voice when you're doing something naughty. Not to mention, now that we have videoconferencing technology like Skype and FaceTime, phone sex has a visual element that ramps up the fun even more.

    Whether you've got a husband in the military stationed far away, or your man goes on a lot of business trips, or you're just looking for new things to try together, this is a super sexy way to connect with your guy.

    But it definitely takes some daring. If you've long been curious about phone sex but worried you'd sound ridiculous, fear not. You just need some prep and practice. There are tricks to making it work that anyone can try -- even you!

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    It happens every time -- just when you've had a few too many salty fries and you are left feeling uncomfortably bloated and blimp-like, your man wants to get it on.

    What's a gal to do? Say "yes" but try to keep her Spanx on during sex? Put the kibosh on the whole carnal idea? Stop eating fries forever (because when are men not in the mood)?

    These questions are common and, according to sex columnist Michael Alvear, author of Not Tonight Dear, I Feel Fat: How to Stop Worrying About Your Body and Have Great Sex, 50 percent of women have them, too. In fact, chances are you have turned down sex because you were having a fat day

    It's sad because sex is fun, and what's more? You are wrong about your body size. Oh yes. You, too. 

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    Dori, the author, at the same age as her daughter nowIf I had a dollar for all the times I’d heard mention of how the father of a newborn daughter is going to have to get a shotgun to someday ward off the boys -- I’d be a zillionaire.

    It’s almost as if there’s this programmed script we can’t let go of that dictates the desire in us to keep our daughters pure, virginal, and untouched by any kind of sexual encounter.

    My 16-year-old daughter, who looks like a cross between Sofia Vergara and Lana Del Rey, would beg to differ. And I would fully support her on this.

    More from The Stir: Sofia Vergara Celebrates a Big Birthday

    I don’t know about you, but the last time I looked, the Victorian age was over. What on earth is it about daughters that make us assume that we should want their potential suitors dead?

    I, for one, feel differently.

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    As someone who writes about sex and love for a living, I have heard a lot of advice on how to keep the passion alive over the years. One of the first things almost every sex expert will say is that you should continue to masturbate. It seems counter-intuitive, right?

    If you are pleasing yourself, why would you need someone else? Au contraire, they say. In this case, it's more about the feelings masturbation conjures. If you have a little pleasure, so they say, you will want more.

    I say: It's hooey.

    Why? Because the fact is, when you satisfy yourself, you ARE satisfied. Full stop. This is a lesson I learned the hard way.

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    We all have sex dealbreakers! For most women, it doesn't take much for us to decide sex is just NOT going to happen. Whether your husband's stinky feet have you kickin' him to the couch or a date's political beliefs have you kickin' him to the curb, guys -- for better or worse -- run the risk of turning us off for a night or forever! And it's really no surprise.

    After all, though men and women reportedly have at least 237 sexual motivations, women's reasons for having sex tend to be much more varied than men's -- from curing a migraine to getting their partners to take out the trash, according to David M. Buss and Cindy M. Meston, Ph.D.s and authors of Why Women Have Sex.

    So it stands to reason that we have just as many -- or more! -- excuses not to jump into bed with our men.

    Let's be honest: Everyone has them. We asked that 12 women reveal their own sex dealbreakers. Just wait 'til you see what they said!

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