If you ever meet an alien from outerspace and need to quickly define to it the difference between human males and females, just direct them to this post! For, lo, there is a nightclub in Scotland that will let men peep into the women's bathroom for the low, low price of $1,200. 

Ladies, I ask you: how much would you pay to peer into a public men's room? Does ZERO DOLLARS sound about right?

I separated from my husband just a year ago. The day before Mother's Day, to be exact. We were just kids when we married sixteen years ago, so breaking up was a seismic event in my life. We'd been together almost my entire adult life. Obviously I couldn't jump into dating right away. I decided to take a year off from men and just work on myself. Do therapy. Work out. Learn how to make myself happy -- which, it turns out, I already knew how to do quite well. And then, finally, after this self-nurturing incubation period I would be ready to enter the world of 21st century dating.

My first post-divorce "dating" experience was way more tawdry and hot than I'd ever expected.

Usually when school rules make the news, you wonder what administrators were thinking. I'm wondering if the higher-ups at the high school in Michigan that has banned baby bumps from the yearbook were thinking at ALL. The school's pregnant teens were told they needed to have their photos re-shot so they didn't show their tummies because -- according to the superintendent anyway -- a baby bump in the yearbook violates the "state’s abstinence-based approach to sex education."

Huh. So parents look to the yearbook to educate their kid? Since when?

When you hear about charges of "lewd and lascivious battery on a child 12 - 16," you usually picture some gross middle-aged adult molesting a young teenager. As far as crimes go, this one is considered among the lowest. But what if those charges are against an 18-year-old girl? Florida teen Kaitlyn Hunt has been charged with two counts of this felony based on a relationship she had with a 15-year-old girl.

Kaitlin and the unnamed teen began their consensual relationship at the beginning of the school year. When the younger girl's parents found out, they went on the offensive, calling the police, pushing to have Kaitlyn expelled from the high school both girls attend, even pressing charges. If you ask Kaitlyn's mother, the charges are motivated by homophobia.

Watching Mad Men the other night, I was struck by how glamorous all the women look ... in bed! They may be a bunch of dysfunctional basket-cases, but none of those ladies -- not even Peggy! -- would be caught dead in some of the scroungy things I sleep in -- from old T-shirts to stretched-out camisoles. Yikes!

So, time for some nighttime spring cleaning, I say! Out with the old, in with the sexy. Are you with me? (I bet your mate is!) To get inspired, here's round-up of nightwear that's sexy but comfortable enough that you can actually sleep in it. Plus you won't feel totally mortified if your kids catch you wearing it!

There's more to sex than just sex. It can't just be an "insert here" and five minutes later be over. I guess, it can -- quickies are fun sometimes -- but not every single time. Enter foreplay! The thing we want to do but sometimes just don't have time to do but we really should do more often because it feels amazing.

I'm not just talking about your typical foreplay here either. Though finger play and oral can be totally mind-blowingly fantastic. Here are a few ideas to get you and your partner super hot for each other and halfway to orgasm.

Image via ekelly89/Flickr

I think we all have hangups, particularly when it comes to our bodies. We think our belly is too jiggly, our butt too squishy, boobs too floppy, whatever too whatever-y. And that affects our sex life. If we're not confident with our bodies, how can we be confident rolling around naked with another naked body? It's why some will only have sex with the lights off or with a shirt on. But interestingly, while our bodies may have been firmer, smaller, or some twisted form of what we thought was better back in our 20s, our sex lives get better as we age.

Burn that into your brains 20-somethings! Old people sex is hot! They don't call it your dirty 30s for nothing. And while we're at it, let's call the next decades the f*&king fabulous 40s and 50s. A new study gives us proof and explanation of these totally sexy and exciting details on why we shouldn't fear getting older.

Ready for more proof that Farrah Abraham is nutters mcgee? The Teen Mom and recent porn star has started a Twitter war with former co-star Catelynn Lowell over -- get this -- who is the better role model.

Ohhhhh, ohhhhh, ohhhhh. I needed that laugh, didn't you? Go on and just let it out!