Is there NOTHING a kid won't get suspended for these days? Hairstyles, Hello Kitty Bubble "Guns," pretending to blast imaginary bad guys with imaginary weapons, bringing a butterknife to cut your fruit because otherwise your braces make it too hard to eat ... and now, writing "YOLO" on a test paper. Along with -- gasp! -- a SMILEY FACE. Yes, apparently having a sense of humor in high school is now sternly frowned upon -- but Kyron Birdine, a junior at Arlington High School in Texas, didn't know it would get him suspended.

Everyone knows that tweens and teens need their sleep. It's during that age span where the most growth, and resting from growth, happens while getting some shut eye, and it's been a problem school officials have been dealing with for decades. Should classes start later? Should there be less homework so teens can get some sleep?

The simple act of dozing in bed is actually one of the most important things a growing child will do all day, so when I heard that some parents were waking their teens up in the middle of the night to complete chores they'd promise to get done, but didn't, I had mixed feelings.

Teenagers are running wild, from what I hear. But kids wouldn’t have to sneak around behind their parents’ backs and do things that got them in trouble if they just had a little more freedom to do the things they really want to do.

I get that schools are really cracking down and have zero tolerance policies for so many things. I get that. But can we please use some common sense? Can we? No? Okay, let's get to this latest story of a student suspended for some ridic reason because of a zero tolerance (i.e., zero common sense) policy. A 13-year-old girl in Attleboro, Massachusetts was suspended from school for bringing a knife onto the property. A butterknife. That she used to cut her fruit. Because she has braces. Roll the insanity.

By now, you've most likely heard all about Victoria's Secret and the "Bright Young Things" controversy. But just in case, here's the CliffsNotes version: Basically, thousands (literally) of "concerned" parents are freaking out over what they believe to be a new lingerie line created by the company with the sole purpose of selling scandalous underwear (panties with the words "I DARE YOU" on the back, etc.) directly to tweens. Indeed, these morally superior matriarchs and patriarchs have started an anti-underpants petition (take THAT, Vicky Secrets!). Among the many, many examples of righteous parental indignation on the petition's website are fears over "sexualizing young women before they are capable of making careful choices about how they will share their bodies and with whom" and accusations of downright "targeting sex to kids." (Huh?) 

There are few things about the Steubenville rape case that aren't terrifying for parents. There is teenage drunkenness, horrible decisions by people who should know better, and worst of all, a football coach named Reno Saccoccia who is accused of trying to cover his players' worst offenses all in the name of football. And oh yes, this man still has a job.

Two boys from his team are accused of raping a young girl while she was drunk and unconscious and then passing around photos of their depraved acts. They are going to prison until they are 21, but their coach is still free to "mold young men." Oh hell no.

Saccoccia has openly yelled at reporters involved in the case and claimed to know nothing of his players' involvement, even though there is strong (STRONG) evidence that he saw the social media evidence and did nothing.

Why does this coach still have a job???? As a parent in Steubenville, I would NOT want him around my kids.

Remember Beyonce, super role model for girls everywhere, even the Obama daughters? Parents everywhere are listening to her much anticipated new song, Bow Down/I Been On, and wondering where that woman went.

In fact, if this song is any sign of what's to come when Bey's new solo album drops, mamas, you're going to want to cover your daughter's ears. Female empowerment just lost a champion.

Need further proof that it's tough out there when you're parenting a daughter? Moms and Dads got great news yesterday that there are now superhero undies for girls too! I was so high off the ground from that one that I should have known the landing was going to hurt something awful. And it did ... that's when someone forwarded me a Rants From Mommyland blog post about Daddy's Money Shoes.

Haven't heard of them? You're lucky. Parent company Skechers is advertising to our kids on TV channels like The Hub, trying to draw them in with some seriously backward thinking about the father/daughter relationship.