POSTS WITH TAG: behavior

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    Recently I met a 3-year-old who said, "It's nice to meet you, Ms. Dutton." I was floored -- my 4-year-old typically greets strangers with a stony silence and a suspicious stare. Still, what jarred me most about this kid's behavior was not just the level of courtesy, but how she addressed me as "Ms." followed by my last name

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    When Kids Lie: 7 Tips for Parents

    posted by Judy Dutton August 12 at 12:00 PM in Big Kid
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    Kid lies start so innocently -- at 3 they may be claiming they brushed their teeth when you know they didn't. At first, you're almost impressed that they can mastermind such a cover-up so young, but then it hits you: If she can fib this well at 2, who knows what tall tales she'll feed you when she's 10 ... or 16? Kids who lie keep parents up at night, so if you want to curb the shenanigans going on behind your back, try these tactics to put your kids on a more honest path. 

    Here's what the experts say to do when your child lies:

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    A few days ago, my daughter did something cute. I filmed her on my iPad and sent it to her grandparents. Then, I couldn't resist, I decided to post the video on Facebook. But first I hesitated because I thought: holy crap, I'm one of those parents who bores everyone with footage of my child doing something that only a mom (and grandparent) thinks is cute.

    I posted it anyway.

    And people, lots of people -- people who have jobs and lives that are far more exciting than mine -- began commenting. And commenting. And "liking" it. And using emoticons to let me know how great it was. And I thought: holy crap, the whole world has collectively gone mad.

    Sometimes we can't help capturing our children's adorable moments. Their spontaneous interpretive dances. The replies they give for why the sky is blue. Tape these moments and keep 'em coming.

    But there are certain vids we, as loving parents, should never post. Hint: anything with tears and raw emotion and Band-Aids being ripped off.

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    Toddlers may be quick to imitate their big siblings, and up until a certain age, matching outfits are all the rage. But as kids grow up, they grow into their own, and fostering their unique identities is just one of many jobs a mom has. "It's essential for a child to learn that they can be separate individuals and siblings at the same time, without having to be carbon copies of each other or to get exactly the same things from parents as proof of love," explains licensed psychologist Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D. Still, there are instances where it may be more appropriate to treat your children the same. Just as there are those where you'll want to be sure to treat them differently.

    Here, all the ways it's okay to treat your kids differently -- and the ways it's not.

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    Introduce me to a person who can say she hasn't done one foolish thing as a teen and I'll ask her to confirm that she isn't actually an alien. Teenagers are supposed to do dumb things. Things that make us scratch our heads and remember that, oh yeah, they're really just super-tall children.

    Breanna Mitchell is no exception. The teen girl got slammed when she posted a selfie on Twitter. She is shown grinning from ear to ear while posing in front of the Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland, where at least 1.1 million people were sent to die during World War II. It's the very definition of a dumb kid move, and it's insensitive and embarrassing. But Breanna does not deserve all the grief she is getting.

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    I would have given my left arm as a kid to get a gift like this one from my parents. The best dad in the world secretly bought tickets to Disney World for his two young children and came up with a creative way to break the happy news to them. He strapped them into a car early one morning, presented them with two separate gift bags, and instructed them to rummage through the bags for clues as to where they were going. What a fun dad!

    The man's adorable daughter was able to piece the mystery together rather quickly. Her exact words when she realized what dad had planned: "Disney World ... Ahhhhhh!!!" Now, that's every parent's dream reaction. His son Gavin didn't exactly share her enthusiasm. The tot had a total meltdown at the thought of Disney -- and dad caught the whole thing on video.

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    Somebody stop me before I utter that phrase all "old people" love to say: what is wrong with kids today?! And the answer is: most young people would NEVER do what three North Carolina teens reportedly did to an innocent man trying to make a living -- but for those guilty, a lack of respect is the number one culprit, if you ask me.

    An ice cream man in Charlotte was going about his day, earning money in an honest way by selling treats from a small portable cart, when three teens reportedly robbed and beat him up -- and someone had the wisdom to capture the entire thing on video. Because I guess they thought this was funny? Or that these young people should be proud of such a momentous achievement in their lives?

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    Think the hardest part of dining out with toddlers is getting them to sit in their seat and wait for their eats? Try this one on for size! A family in Georgia is claiming they were kicked out of a restaurant because of their 4-year-old's shirt.

    Little Lewis Roberts was dressed like most kids his age in a lime green Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tee. But that wasn't the problem for The Tavern at Phipps Plaza, an Atlanta eatery. It was the fact that Lewis' shirt had no sleeves -- and the restaurant has a clear "gentlemen's dress code" that forbids sleeveless shirts.

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    I recently needed to wrap a present, and as I was digging through the junk drawer for the Scotch tape, I remembered: Oh yeah, I have children. Therefore, the tape isn't in the drawer. It isn't on my desk or in the kids' crafting supplies or anywhere that makes any kind of sense. Fifteen increasingly frustrating minutes later, I found the tape abandoned on the base of my 6-year-old's bedroom lamp next to a random assortment of seashells, a LEGO vehicle of some kind, and a homemade hatchet.

    In my experience, once you give birth, certain things are never where they're supposed to be. (And I'm not just talking about my hooters, although frankly I wish I'd been warned I'd eventually need a spatula to get a sports bra on.) I've been photo-documenting this irritating phenomenon and I'd like to share my findings with you, so you can tell me: is it just me? Am I the only one whose children are part magpie? Should I just give up on having easily accessible wrapping tape EVER AGAIN??

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    We keep hearing again and again how kids these days are entitled, spoiled, narcissistic, and, as a result, deeply unprepared to handle the "real world." And who's to blame? Permissive, overprotective, helicopter parents, of course. It's these pervasive beliefs that author Alfie Kohn set out to debunk in his new book The Myth of the Spoiled Child: Challenging the Conventional Wisdom About Children and Parenting.

    Alfie spoke with The Stir today about what inspired him to take on the controversial topic of coddled kids and "overindulgent" parents, what parents really need to do to promote their child's success, and why we should be grooming a generation of rebels ...

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