When Boys Touch Themselves


underwearFunny. I had just posted a story on Oprah's controversial episode about talking to girls about sex--and masturbation, when I read this:

My stepson is 8-years-old. For the last year, he grabs at himself all the time, and sometimes will have his hand down the front of his pants, playing with himself. I tell him to stop doing that at least 5 times every day. I feel like with him getting older, he shouldn't be doing that... He doesn't have a rash or isn't wearing any kind of underwear or pants that could be making him itch, so I'm very concerned about the reason.. Anyone else's kids do this?--PeytonsMom21109

Uh, yeah. As a mother of two boys--3 and 5--I've witnessed my share of this. But like GrnEyedGrandma (who's raised two boys herself) added, "It's so normal it isn't funny. Remind him that touching himself is his private business and needs to be done in private.. Also make him wash his hands..a lot."

Well said.

Does your son idly put his hands "down there?"


behavior, elementary school


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mlreg... mlregalado

My nephews all did this. When I first got guardianship they would sit on the couch and "fiddle" (this was a 12y/o) and I just pointed out that they could do that all they wanted in their rooms. The only one(out of 3) that doesn't always do it in private now is the 7y/o.

nucle... nuclear_sugar

My almost-3-year-old has really gotten into touching himself the past few months....we've taught him to say "Mommy I need some privacy" and to go into his room when he needs a moment alone with his member.

Our only problem is that he likes to stuff THINGS into his underwear, I guess to see how they feel differently with all those nerve endings down there....but he'll come out of his room with a stuffed toy, a nickel, a racecar, and plastic ice cream cone all tucked into his underwear!! Sometimes I worry about leaving him in his room to do his 'bidness and then having him come out with a handful of poop-smeared, germy toys. Blech!

1stti... 1sttimemommy198

My son is 16months old and as soon as I open his daiper, his hands are on his wee wee...sometimes he will stick his hands in the side of his diaper to get ahold of it...I tell him to stop all the time...

Jessi... Jessica_Izzy

Just let them know that it's ok to do that but somewhere private :).

odeemv odeemv

With my 18 month old, we just say, "Yes that's your penis" when he grabs it during diaper changes or the bath. I've always heard to teach that body part just like any other and plus we don't think masturbating is "bad". When he gets older, we'll teach him to go in private. Men of all ages love that part of the body.

amber... amber1216

I was mortified the first time I caught my 3 yo playing with himself! But thanks to Cafemom and all the nice ladies here, I was reassured that it was perfectly normal. I just tell him to go to his room to do that.

Caram... Caramel824

PLEASE my family is so TOUCHY exscuse the cliche that you arent even allowed to touch yourself. Me I say do it in your own room. it is an invasion of privacy to OBSESS about other peoples sex lives!!!!!!!!!!!!! OBTRUSIVE,ANNOYING and NOSY to the point of WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR MALFUNCTION???!!!!embarrassed

singl... single_mommie24

my son will be 5 but he does it in his room he's never done it in public. When i go to check on him b4 i go to bed he always asleep with his hands down his pajama pants!

Guara... Guaranteed

I just sent my bff (my son's godmother) a picture of him, chilling in his little chair, watching a movie, hand down his pants. It was just so funny...guys will be guys, at whatever age. He's only 2, so he really doesn't understand, sometimes when it gets hard he even says it hurts, lol, poor baby. We're starting to teach him that it's ok that that happens, and if he wants to touch it, he shouldn't do it in front of other people.

emBlaze emBlaze

I'm so glad I found this thread...my son is 6 (7 in July) and touches himself repeatedly! It gets on my nerves and I have begged my husband to talk to him about it. He USED to put his hands down his pants a lot, but now he just grabs/adjusts himself through his clothes. I guess it's still better than having his hands down the front of his pants in public. But the grasping he does in public is embarrassing. I'm not sure if I want to send him to his room THAT LONG!! LOL I'll have to think about that one. He'll do it on his own eventually, but for now...I don't want to know how often he really does it.

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