Hey Parents: Stop Publicly Shaming Your Kids & Get a Life

Rant 28

Girl forced to wear shirt with dad's face for breaking curfewYou have to be living under a rock to miss all the slew of parents publicly humiliating their teens in order to punish them for their bad behavior.

And while my own parents had creative methods for punishing us as kids that were very effective, they were done in the privacy of our own home, and not for entire world to see.

Lately, I believe this public shaming trend is more about the parent getting attention rather than actually disciplining their child, and quite frankly, it disgusts me.

In a relationship that should be built on trust, I'm hard-pressed to believe that parents forcing a kid to do something publicly humiliating will foster respect and love.

On the contrary, I think it's demeaning and tells a kid that they're stupid. And it instills fear, which won't necessarily discourage a child from doing something, but rather encourage them to continue doing it just without the parent knowing.

And now that these photos of kids with signs around their necks or like this girl, with her dad's face on her t-shirt circulating around Facebook, it seems as though parents are picking up on this trend not necessarily because they really care about changing their kid's behavior, but because they see it as an opportunity to get attention and fame.

You really want to be the parent who gets famous for being a jerk to your kid? Terrible. Look at the father's smiling face. So gross.

For as many parents who will say this was a last resort for them, that their child was completely out of control and this was the only way for them to do something, I would say it's yet another lazy parenting decision. Where exactly were you when your kid did need actual discipline?

And now, instead of instituting rules and punishments that will establish trust, allow them to learn a skill, or perhaps teach them a valuable lesson about life, you're showing them how to be a bully.

Here's a thought: If you're so desperate to get famous, do something embarrassing and awful to yourself. But leave your kids, who have no choice in the matter and will have to deal with these photos later in life when college admissions personnel and potential employers search for them, out of it.

Do you think it's okay to publicly shame a child to punish them?

Photo via Inquisitr

behavior, tweens, teens, middle school, in the news, high school


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

TeamT... TeamTARDIS

I think it is about time that people like you realize that you have no say in how people parent or discipline their children. I am so sick and tired of everyone thinking they have the right to judge everything that other parents do just because you wouldn't parent that way. 

News Flash: unless you want the rest of the world to place a magnifying glass over  your parenting job (and trust me they would find a million things to judge you about) then you need to stop thinking your opinion matters at all or that you even have a right to speak that opinion publicly.

silve... silverdawn99

punishments and rules doesnt get it through their thick skulls

make them ashamed of what they did? perfect idea because teenagers does not care what their parents think or say

singl... singlemama74

Teenagers don't care what their parents think but embarress them in front of their peers and they won't want that again. Do I think this is the answer everytime a punishment is needed? No. Do I think it could very effective? Yep and when my son is older I wouldn't rule it out.

nicki... nicki.hemingway

I foresee a while bunch of "parents" getting kicked out of their young adult children's lives in a few years. Yes discipline is necessary, this level of humiliation is not discipline.  Children deserve to be treated with respect they are people too and what some parents have done is not discipline but degradation on their child's person-hood. 

MaryC... MaryCimino

It's a catch 22 with shaming, you have to make them take responsibility for their actions but yet you don't want them to not trust you.

So for being out past curfew I will go to my child's school dressed as a banana to give them their lunch. And then do the peanut butter jelly dance. That'll show them.

nekoy... nekoyukidoll

I say if it works, do it.  Teens need to learn they can't do and say whatever they want and if shaming them gets the point across then by all means the parent should do it.  I used to know a teen whose parents did the whole "no facebook for a week "  when she put something she shouldn't have on FB.  Few weeks later, she did it again.  Same punishment.  When i mentioned to her sister that the girl should maybe stay off social sites for a bit, she said "oh no, she's learned her lesson."  Really sad.

Pinkmani Pinkmani

Amen! I think it's stupid.

First off, my teenaged brother knows better than to do stupid sh*t. He knows my parents won't bail him out of jail, and that they will kick his ass out. Do a better job parenting...


RoseL... RoseLiMom

i this its absurd and discipline should be a private matter

IKnow... IKnow0101

I don't know if I would do it but just because you don't agree with the tactic doesn't make it lazy parenting.  For the fact that they care to do something about it regardless of how you feel show they are concern for their children.

nonmember avatar Zuri

Teenagers don't care what their parents think? I beg to differ.

1-10 of 28 comments 123 Last