Some Piedmont, California parents received quite a shock when they learned of a sick sex game going on in the kids' high school. It seems some boys had started a Fantasy Slut League in which they "drafted" unsuspecting girls and scored points for sex with them.
School officials were tipped off by students after a date-rape prevention assembly. While this twisted extracurricular is not illegal, it certainly is immoral. I wish I could say I was totally surprised by the depravity, but sadly I'm not.
The letter from Principal Rich Kitchens said it was set up by members of varsity teams and described a competition "in which our female students (unbeknownst to most of them) are drafted as part of the league...Male students earn points for documented engagement in sexual activities with female students."
School officials hope alerting the parents will spark "an open, serious and honest dialogue between kids and families," said. Randall Booker, assistant superintendent. "It's one thing for us to have a conversation with our students. It's another thing for families to have that dinner-table conversation."
To be frank, that is a discussion that should have happened years. ago. So many teen boys everywhere have no respect for female peers. I can't tell you how many times I've seen young men get out of line with a girl they see on the street or on the subway. In the instance at this school, older students would pressure younger ones to join in. "Participation often involved pressure/manipulation by older students that included alcohol to impair judgement/control and social demands to be popular," the principal explained.
It part it is the fault of an over-sexualized society. We can't take our eyes off of the Jersey Shore's smush-fest, the Bachelorette's fantasy suite, and just about every other racy reality show on TV. Nothing is left to the imagination. Nothing! In fact, one night stands are celebrated and deemed cool. Even what was once considered a taboo, like teen pregnancy, is now a gateway to fame.
But the half of the blame is squarely on our shoulders. I know teens who want to have sex are going to have sex. There has to be a way to teach them that this kind of behavior is not okay. If there is a way to intervene, it has to begin when they are young.
Teaching out kids about sex isn't just a how-to, nut and bolts discussion. And it's not just girls that need to learn how to respect their bodies. With males, there is still this "boys will be boys" attitude with a wink, wink. That in not only sleazy, it's dangerous in this day and age. There is something to be said for teaching old-fashioned, genteel manners, especially when it comes to dealing with women. Bottom line, it is our responsibility to make sure our boys grow up to be good, decent young men.
How can we teach boys to be more respectful of women?