Oh to be a fly on the wall in Madonna's house right now! Word has it her 16-year-old daughter Lourdes Leon has had just about enough of living with the one and only Madonna. The rumors are that she wants to move in with her papa Carlos Leon.
Can you blame her? She's a 16-year-old girl who wants to get away from her mother. Oh yeah, and that mother is MADONNA.
The tabloids claim Madonna is too strict on Lourdes, and the 16-year-old wants out of the spotlight. In other words? She doesn't want to be "Madonna's daughter" anymore. She has a point ... Madonna may just be the world's most embarrassing mama, especially for a teenager. Let's look at the evidence, shall we?
More from The Stir: Madonna Turns 53, Still Thinks She's 23
1. Madonna was a cougar before the word cougar was even invented. The ages of her boy toys dip so low that it won't be long before Lourdes would be able to date them herself. In fact, let's do the math. She's 16. French dancer (and Madonna's latest man) Brahim Zaibat is 24. That's eight years, folks ... eight measly years. And we're not even going to start on the public hand jobs ...
2. Madonna likes to flash her fans. Remember that boob shot she gave the crowd earlier this year during a performance of "Human Nature"? Imagine being the teenage girl who has to compete with her mom's chest ... exactly. Moms can still be sexy, but there is a limit!
3. Madonna can't keep her trap shut about Lady Gaga. Is there anything more embarrassing for a teenager than a parent who is loudly protesting whatever is hot among teens these days? Think about how the Gore kids felt when Tipper was demanding parental advisory stickers on albums. Now imagine how Lourdes must feel when her friends want to know why her mom has such a problem with Gaga.
4. Madonna still thinks she's as cool as she was back in the day. Have you seen her "Turn Up the Radio" video? It's more or less Madonna's version of digging around in the closet for the acid washed jeans and scrunchies from high school and wearing them out in public. At some point every parent has to acknowledge that 20 years ago people had really bad taste and move on -- for their own sakes, if not their kids'. Madge hasn't gotten there yet.
5. Madonna wears squeaky leather (pleather?) catsuits in public. Seriously, this is worse than mom jeans, people!
With all this, can you really blame Lourdes for wanting to move in with her dad? Would you want Madonna as your mom?
Image via Splash News