The teen years are filled with uncertainty, nail biting worry, and questionable behavior ... for parents. Kids can make us nuts; teens finish us off. They are these able-bodied almost adults running loose often without the ability to make sensible decisions. And many of those bad decisions come when teens are bored. Which they almost always seem to be.
I was reading the book Five Little Monkeys With Nothing to Do by Eileen Christelow to my kids and thought this is perfect! My little ones will learn that you can't ever be bored -- there are always rugs to beat dirt out of, rooms to be cleaned, and berries to be picked for mama. Great message, but the book is for the wee ones who clearly forget the sentiment once teenage brain takes over. Well, Northland College Principal John Tapene took the words he heard from a judge who often deals with troubled youth and shared them in a very clear way, maybe even harsh way.
Always we hear the cry from teenagers "What can we do, where can we go?"
My answer is this: Go home, mow the lawn, wash the windows, learn to cook, build a raft, get a job, visit the sick, study your lessons, and after you've finished, read a book. Your town does not owe you recreational facilities and your parents do not owe you fun.
The world does not owe you a living, you owe the world something. You owe it your time, energy and talent so that no one will be at war, in sickness and lonely again. In other words, grow up, stop being a cry baby, get out of your dream world and develop a backbone not a wishbone. Start behaving like a responsible person. You are important, you are needed. It's too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday. Someday is now and that somebody is you!
Well, well, well. He said something all of us thought, but maybe not enough of us say. I also think so adults would benefit from these words as well. We need to be humble and appreciative. There is always something to do ... beyond putting on the television and mindlessly watching it for hours and hours and hours day after day. We shouldn't wait for hand-outs -- working hard is not just good for getting things you want and need, but it's good for the soul.
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Though I do think we need a backbone AND a wishbone. Wishing is dreaming. Dreaming is often how amazing things happen, how creativity blossoms, which I think is vital for kids, even adults. We should never stopped dreaming, aspiring, and then making that reality.
Still, it's tough to say how some teens would react to these words. Some may just shrug it off because of how the tone would be read. We may need to focus more on the inspirational than the "do this" tactic.
What do you think of these words for teens? Too harsh? Or needed?
Image via crazytales562/Flickr
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Comments 17
That will have no effect. All they hear is "Wah you're being a crybaby now go do chores" and they're gonna think "Fuck that I want to have fun. Stupid adults."
There are enough toys, balls, electronics, movies, & animals around here that if they're "bored" they obviously need something productive to do.
I told my 9yo son that if he had energy to pester his sisters, he had energy to scrub the bathroom. He grumbled, but was grateful when he was done. I've even gone so far as to line up my 3 older kids ages 9, 6, & 4 and have them all paint a brick wall dividing our house from our neighbors. Bored? Do something productive
I tell my 8 y/o this constantly. There is enough things to play with or go outside and play on the swingset or ride her bike. If she's still 'soooo bored' then I'll be more than happy to find some obscure chore for her to do. Needless to say, my baseboards look AWESOME!
The other 2 are quite considerate, thoughtful, and willing to do whatever you tell them. You just have to get up and tell them
The world does owe the younger generation something... The opportunity to live the American dream. How can a teenager get a job in this economy when college graduates and grown adults can't get one?
I think the best thing for a teen to do is get a job. That will solve the boredom problem for the most part, along with teaching work ethics, and see what it's like in the real world. Also, if they start off with some crappy retail job, or flipping burgers, they will see first hand what they DON'T want for the rest of their lives. Let em see what it's like to have taxes taken away from them, and what it's like to have a budget. Make them buy their own clothes and gasoline for their cars. Teach them how to save. I tried and experienced so many jobs growing up, and they all helped me realize what I did and didn't want for myself in life.
If we wait to apply these principals when our kids are teens, then yes it will just be a tuned out lecture. The time to start is during the formitive years, the first five years of life. Parents are so busy trying to turn their toddlers into little Einsteins with flashcards and reading videos that they are failing to teach the basics, such as self worth, empathy and respect for self and others. If we teach our young children to respect their surroundings and other people then as they grow being a responsible, self sufficiant person will come naturally.
As for having dreams, yes dreams are wonderful, but I want my children to turn their dreams into goals. The difference between the two is a realistic timeline with an end date (ie:" by the end of the summer I want to have saved enough money to buy a new bike", rather then, "Having a new bike would be so awesome, someday I'll get one).
teenagers lol ......... they need to grow into being a responsible adult
well if they are bored the floors need scrubbing, the dishes need unloading, the house needs vacuuming, and we could go through the toys that are obviously not being used and make a donation to charity.