When you are a mother living in an area where childcare is scarce, you learn to worship at the altar of the teenage babysitter. Mine has saved my sanity, my sense of humor, and then some. But the Connecticut mom who just got arrested for leaving her 13-year-old home alone to watch over her three youngest kids scared the dickens out of me.
Considering I -- and most former babysitters I know -- started watching over kids at 13 or even younger, if this is now criminal behavior, we're all in trouble. This is not like leaving a house full of toddlers! Using the oldest kid to watch the younger kids, especially, is a time-honored tradition.
Young's neighbor apparently called the cops to say the 4-year-old who lived across the street had wandered into her yard. They arrived to find Young's 13-year-old was alone in their house with siblings aged 10 and 1 1/2, plus the wandering 4-year-old, and charged Young -- who'd left to go to church but said a real babysitter was on the way to relieve the young teen -- with risk of injury to a minor.
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I get it ... sort of. Just because they're "old enough" to babysit doesn't mean they're necessarily good at it. At least Rebecca Young's teenager wasn't good enough at the gig to handle a handful of kids. That's where a parent has to make some tough decisions: whether it's the parent of the kids being babysat saying, "OK, this teen is great, but not so great with kids" or the mother of a teenager saying, "Sorry, but my child isn't mature enough to handle that many kids."
Not to mention: a teenager needs to know where to draw the line when they take on a babysitting gig, even if it is watching their own siblings. Three kids is a lot!
I love my babysitter in part because she knows her limits. I always ask her if she feels comfortable with a few more kids when my daughter is going to have a playdate, and I trust her to be honest with me. She usually says yes, but she has told me what kids she does NOT think she could handle.
I'm still uneasy about calling this criminal behavior. As CNN's Ashleigh Banfield pointed out in a debate over Young's arrest, even good moms have had a toddler wander out of the house. It happens. But it's certainly a wake-up call for parents.
What's the maximum number of kids you'd put in the hands of one teenage babysitter?
Image via petercastleton/Flickr
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Comments 154
This is a little confusing. Was the 13 year old supposed to be babysitting, or was there another babysitter supposed to be babysitting? Was it a case of "hey, watch your siblings until the babysitter gets here in a half hour?" It seems like the mother wasn't necessarily charged because the babysitter was 13 years old, but because she failed to leave her children under responsible supervision. If the 13 year old babysitter had been a neighbor kid, and the kids were wandering around outside, the mother would have stilled been charged. The fuzzy thing is the age that the babysitter is old enough to be charged with neglect - but then that brings the argument that "if they aren't old enough to be held responsible for their own actions, then they aren't old enough to supervise other children." Ugh. If only things were as simple as they were in the Babysitter Club books.
I started babysitting my two younger brothers when I was 11, and I see no reason why a 13 year old couldn't be left with her siblings for a few hours. The four year old wandered out of the house, big deal, was this really a situation where the neighbor had to call the police? That seems a little overzealous, as was arresting the poor mother of these kids.
Poor mother.
I would babysit 2 kids when I was 11. They were probably 5 and 7, I think. Is that really illegal?
I babysat for a family of 3 - the boy was 3 and the twin girls were pre-crawling when I started. That was when I was 16 and/or 17. Now I look back & wonder how I did it. Not sure I could handle that many now (especially twins!) at those ages.
I myself started babysitting when I was 11 years old. My youngest daughter started watching her two little brothers around the age of 11 also, but I would not leave them with her older sister . I too believe it is a matter of maturity and state laws
There are a few things wrong with this..... the two oldest are 13 and 10. I know my kids could keep an eye on their younger siblings for a little while at either of those ages. Also, What kind of neighbor calls the cops when the neighbor child wanders into their yard??? So much for "It takes a village"...... And what is the legal age to babysit in Connecticut? I live in PA, and can honestly tell you I have no idea if there is a legal age to babysit here. I could have probably been arrested several times for leaving my little one home alone with his older brothers while I ran to the store!!