It's awfully tempting to say that we have it so much worse than our parents did. They didn't have to worry about us texting and driving or the ozone layer being completely obliterated by SUVs and hairspray. But this week we've been served a sad reminder that the more things change, the more parenting comes down to one cruel fact.
We can only do so much to protect our kids, but in the end, they -- not us -- control their destinies. Just look at Taylor Sauer, the Idaho teenager whose last Facebook blast, sent out on her cellphone as she hurtled down the highway, has made the rounds of the web. Just before slamming into a tanker truck as she drove home from college, Sauer sent out one last ominous message.
I can't discuss this now. Driving and facebooking is not safe! Haha
Some are calling it spooky, some prophetic, but I have another word. Life. As in, that's life, and even the best parents can't control it.
Obviously Taylor had been taught about the dangers of simultaneously operating a cellphone and a motor vehicle. And just as obviously, she ignored the warnings because -- as her parents told the Today show -- she thought she was invincible:
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Isn't that the way it is with kids? We can say the same things over and over and over again, even make them parrot them back, but in the end, they will make up their own minds about what applies to them and what doesn't. We can't "make them" listen.
It's not just the big stuff like dangerous texting and driving. It's the everyday lessons. I don't know how many times I've told my daughter that she needs to get to sleep at night so she can wake up rested in the morning and tackle her schoolwork with a fresh mind. But she is her own person. I can't make her sleep.
Sure, I can make her stay in her room. I can make her stay in her bed. But I can't morally, physically, legally walk into her room, climb into her bed, and hold her eyelids shut so she will actually fall asleep at a decent hour. It's her body. Her decision.
I watched the Sauers this morning, and my heart aches. Because they lost a daughter. Because they tried their best. Because right now, they represent the scariest part of being a parenting: we give them life, but what they do with it really is up to them.
What have you tried to teach your kids but fear they have yet to really understand?
Image via Today
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Comments 9
tattooedmom: There are also laws against drinking and driving and speeding but lawsdont stop it from happening. passing a law for every little thing, IMO, is dangerous. How would police enforce a law against texting while driving anyway? Are they going to pull us over for looking down?
Either way, this is sad.
I forwarded this article to my SD from the Today Show web page. Teens are so good at texting they hardly realize it as a problem.
I think that just like drinking and driving if texting and driving is illegal it can have the same ramifications if a person causes and accident while "under the influance." It's an actual problem and a public safety issue. That's what laws are for.
we have laws in Mississippi that has banned cellphone use while driving. if you are caught you can be fined. but its very discouraging when you pull up to a red light and the police officer in the next lane is laughing and talking on his phone. how can we get civilians to follow the law when the law enforcers do not. either way my condolences goes out to this family and eveery family who has lost a loved one due to accidents such as these
The sad thing is, it's not just teens who still text and drive. My sister is constantly texting and facebooking while driving, even with her kids in the car! Her own daughter told her to stop, but of course, my sis knows everything and nobody can tell her what to do and heaven help the person who tries, even when she is straddling both lanes while she updates her status.
So sad. In my state there is a law about texting and driving and if caught you do get a hefty fine. It's pretty easy though for a cop to spot someone texting. It's obvious if your looking down for a long period of time and only one hand is on the wheel, generally screams that you're texting. And even if your not, it's still dangerous to take your eyes off the road. I never text and when I drive I always have a headset in so my hands are free and my eyes are on the road. This is so preventable and many don't stop and think about how they could kill themselves and/or others.
Law enforcement are exempt from the cell phone law- at least here in CA.
"This section does not apply to an emergency services professional using a wireless telephone while operating an authorized emergency vehicle, as defined in Section 165 [which includes police vehicles], in the course and scope of his or her duties." (Veh C 23123(d)
I really really really wish that we had a 'qoute' feature on The Stir, too :( I want to quote Stacy from above.... the laws may not completely stop people from doing stupid stuff, but it is still a good idea. IMO.