Parents Who Hired Man to Beat Teen Took 'Nice Mom & Dad' Too Far

on December 13, 2011 at 2:33 PM

discipline stick Picture this. Your kid is misbehaving, and you walk out of the room to get the phone. Who are you calling? Why, the discipline patrol, of course! Because you don't want to get your widdle hands dirty with a little thing called parenting, would you?

If you think that sounds crazy, well, can we talk about the parents in California who allegedly hired a man to beat their teenage son when they found a lighter in his belongings? Paul Kim told police the 15-year-old's parents thought he'd taken up smoking. And wait until you hear why they called Kim!

Apparently this is what he does! When parents who attend the same church as Kim in the Irvine, California area need someone to keep the little whippersnappers in line, they call him up to do the discipline. Excuse me, why? Why do parents need someone else to discipline their kids for them? Why does someone else have to be the bad guy? So they can be the nice parents?

I'll admit there are times when my kid's actions leave me so frustrated that I just can't deal with her. Time-out -- in my house anyway -- is as much about giving me a chance to cool down and collect my thoughts as it is a straight up punishment for my daughter. But once they are collected, so to speak, you had better believe I'm setting her straight on what's expected from her in our house. My husband and I gave life to this child, and it's our job to mold her into the well-behaved adult she will one day be.

Calling someone else to do the dirty work has just never occurred to me. And yet, I'm (sadly) not surprised. I know parents who refused to be in the room when their pediatrician gave their child shots in the toddler years, lest the child associate Mom with the pain. Others like to try to rope the teacher and for her to be enforcer. And there's always that divorced couple you know where one plays good cop all the time so the other has to look like the jerk when they put their foot down.

Why is it such a bad thing to look strong in front of your kids? It's not our job to be nice. It's our job to be parents!

If you're trying to be your kids' friends, just think ... this could be you in a year. Still want to be the "nice" mom and dad?

Would you ever let someone else discipline your children?

Image via Grotuk/Flickr

About the author Jeanne Sager

writes articles for The Stir by day, slays closet monsters and bounds through bedtime stories with her elementary schooler by night. Diet Pepsi courses through her veins. The Phineas and Ferb soundtrack reverberates through her brain.

Filed Under: behavior, family

Comments (9)

Zyva

on Dec 13, 2011 at 2:57 PM

If you cannot parent your child, perhaps you should not have them.

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vamom08

on Dec 13, 2011 at 3:36 PM

Hell No !!! I feel like they brung the child into the world they should be the one thats handleing that situation not someone esle.My own mother dont discipline my daughter these people are crazy to let someone punish thier child they are not model parents.

Aurastar

on Dec 13, 2011 at 7:09 PM

Sick!

Panda2778

on Dec 14, 2011 at 1:00 AM

Ok, I guess I'm a failure at parenting. My sister just happens to live next door. There are times when my kids drive me SO insane that I can't deal with them. So, I call her to come over and give me a break before I do something stupid. It seems that my teenager listens to my sister better sometimes, even when my DD can't do anything except scream and yell at me.

Sidthe

on Dec 15, 2011 at 6:39 PM

Panda there is a big difference between asking your sister over to give you a break so you don't end up killing your kid and hiring someone to spank your kid's butt because you want to be the "nice" parent.

And if my parents at any point in time hired somone to spank my butt you best believe the would be FAR from the "nice" parent in my eye. They may not have done it themselves but they did hire the person to do the spanking. And they'd have lost just about all the respect I had for them by hiring someone else to do the spanking rather than doing it themselves like the parents they are supposed to be! I also know very few teenagers or kids who wouldn't see it the same.