Duck, duck, duck ... Hummer? Oops. A 19-year-old in Ann Arbor, Michigan, is being charged with felony animal cruelty for running over a family of ducks in a McDonald's parking lot with a Hummer. If convicted, Dillon Pearce could face up to four years in prison.
Yes, you read that correctly. Take a second to let it all sink in -- if you're like me, simply seeing the words Hummer, duck, McDonald's, and felony in one paragraph just gave you the equivalent of an ice cream headache. Is this really what teenagers today are doing for "fun"? Or was it an accident and moms everywhere should rally to clear his name?
Ready? Let me break this one down for you. In Pearce's version of the story, he drives himself and two of his buddies to McDonald's in the aforementioned Hummer (which I'm guessing belongs to his parents, only because how many 19-year-olds can afford a Hummer?). They notice a mother duck and a bunch of ducklings nesting under a nearby bush, waddling perilously in and out of traffic. Being charitable young men, Pearce and his pals decide to move the family to a safer location, and one of the kids hops out and tries to pick up a duckling, only to be yelled at by a McDonald's employee. Whatevs, the boys figure. They go through the drive-through and scarf down their food in a nearby parking lot. Only problem is, this is a Hummer full of teenage boys we're talking about, and they're still hungry. So they head back to the drive-through for more grub ... only this time, they unwittingly run over and kill the entire feathered family.
That's when the McDonald's employees called the cops, who tracked the Hummer to a gas station. When questioned, Pearce said he had no idea he ran over the ducks ... but apparently those Mickey D's workers (who alleged that Pearce slaughtered the birds on purpose as an act of revenge) were very convincing, because the cops arrested him anyway. He was arraigned Tuesday on one count of killing/torturing animals. Currently out on bail, Pearce will head back to court on May 4.
Can I just say ... wtf??? First of all, when I was a teenaged driver, I accidentally ran over a squirrel without realizing it, and that was in my mother's aging Ford Mustang. You're telling me it's not possible to drive over a bunch of ducks in a vehicle built for navigating landmine-riddled terrain and not feel it?
Secondly, can we just take a good look at Pearce's mugshot? He has the same look on his face that my son used to get when he was 2 and discovering that things like ants die when you step on them. Really? This kid is a felon??
Lastly ... four years in prison, huh? There are convicted sex offenders who have received prison sentences ranging from 60 days to six months. Look, I like ducks, ducklings are adorable, it's sad they had to die (outside of a restaurant that serves dead cows, chickens, and who knows what else, but we won't even go there). Still, you're telling me that running over a duck -- even if it was on purpose -- is a greater crime than molesting a child???
Do you think Pearce's potential punishment is fair?
Image via Ann Arbor Police/Annarbor.com
This Hot Dad Wants to Do Your Ironing
KStew Refuses to Shower
This Hot Dad Wants to Cook You Dinner
This Hot Dad Cooks AND Does the Dishes
Comments 47
A felony?!?!? You have GOT to be kidding me. If it could be proven that it was on purpose, I see could slapping him with a fine, putting a mark on his driving record somehow. But a felony and prison time? I'm sorry but running over ducks is not worth that. I love the cute little creatures too but let's get serious here.
They should let him go and apologize for wasting his time. You're totally right about his face, I don't think he could hurt a fly on purpose.
I know where we live we get a LOT of Canadian Geese, if you hit one of them....it is a LOT of trouble for you! They are a protected bird or something like that here. Hate those darn geese, they run the whole dang town, I hate taking my kids or dog to the lake, it isn't safe with those feathered fowl trying to goose everyone with in sight they are SUCH a nuisance. HOWEVER, on to this kid? I think he should get SOME kind of punishment, but not 4 years in jail! Community service, and a fine, and maybe take his license away for 60 days.
You're telling me that his face looks like he couldn't hurt anything? His FACE? Of course he looks sad, he got arrested! Speaking of child molesters, killers, rapists - they look like regular people, too. Not everyone has a big scary appearance, and that story is the lamest I've ever heard in my life. I'm nineteen, too. I don't back over a family of baby ducks. If he was going back for more food he would have had to go all the way around, to get back in line, not back up. Four years is a bit much, but he needs major counseling for a long time.
NO PRISON TIME !!!!!!!!!! ur rt molersters get off with a slap on the wrist a guy killed my best friend and she was pregnant and he only got 4 yrs in prison let him go with community service
I speak for the ducks. I'm sure there was some evidence that the ducks were killed maliciously and that it was not an "accident'. This type of behavior is sick and perverted and disgusting. I highly doubt that the Judge or Jury or whomever made the decision had zero evidence. If it doesn't look like a duck, quack like a duck and walk like a duck, it is probably not a duck. I raised a son who is now 22 years old and I can tell you that boys tend to be somewhat malevolent when no one is looking. Do I agree with a 4 year sentence? Probably not. It is a sick beginning for this kid and his friends.
He looks like a self- entitled, regular 19 yr. old punk to me, maybe it was on purpose and maybe it wasn't. 4 yrs. seems like a bit much maybe probation or something. Either way there should be some form of punishment because next time it could be a kid.