Gutsy Dad Turns His Own Kids In to Police for Bullying

on March 21, 2011 at 9:09 AM

fight Sometimes you just have to go hardcore on your kids. No parent ever got respect with a wimpy "oh, honey, don't do that," followed by you walking away. But a dad who caught his teenagers bullying a 13-year-old and drove them straight to the police station is making me rethink my whole "hardcore" strategy.

Did he really just turn his own kids in to the COPS? The story out of Australia is painful to read -- especially in light of fellow Australian Casey Heynes and his bullying situation. But apparently Dad, known only as Matt, was driving home when he spotted his 17-year-old son and 15-year-old daughter beating up a 13-year-old boy.

And this wasn't just some name calling. As he told a radio station, they were "beating the living crap out of this kid." In fact, Matt's kids BROKE THE CHILD'S JAW!!

Here's where I'd doff my cap at Matt -- if I had a cap -- because what he did was "the right thing to do." He took the injured boy home to his parents, then took his kids to the cops, who charged them with assault. He was right. What his kids did was criminal. Talk about being a disciplinarian. Talk about making your kids accept responsibility for their actions!

That's a parent's job. To teach their kids what life is like in the real world. We can comfort, but we can't coddle. And one of the few good notes to come out of the Heynes' story was seeing his bully's mom admit outright that her kid wasn't automatically in the right. We're missing too much of that in a world where parents are lawsuit crazy if the teacher looks at their child wrong.

But I wonder if I could do what Matt did so quickly. He didn't pause. He just did it.

I wonder if I could take my kid to the cops first. I'd discipline the bejesus out of her for sure. I'd be sitting down with that other child's parents, offering everything but my first born (since she's the problem) to pay for their child's pain and suffering. But I really have to wonder if I'd have the guts to march my kid into a police station and say, "Hey, come here, you don't know it, but she's a criminal."

A friend once knew his son was wanted by the police, and he called them to his house so that the arrest would go down off the streets, in the privacy of their home. That I could do. If the crime was known, if that other parent was already pressing charges, you'd better believe we'd be owning right up and turning her in. But I think it would take me awhile to decide.

I think Matt is one of the gutsiest dads I've heard about in a long time. What about you? Could you turn your kids in to the cops without a second thought?

Image via Polina Sergeeva/Flickr

About the author Jeanne Sager

writes articles for The Stir by day, slays closet monsters and bounds through bedtime stories with her elementary schooler by night. Diet Pepsi courses through her veins. The Phineas and Ferb soundtrack reverberates through her brain.

Filed Under: bullies, behavior

Comments (68)

Aurorasmommy07

on Mar 21, 2011 at 9:25 AM

GO DAD!!!!!!!!! Yea i think if i came across my daughter doing something like that i would like to think i would turn her in. Thats just wrong and if shes has not learned that yet from how she was raised then she needs some learnin from the school of hard knocks! As of yet not so worried b/c she is 3.

you rock

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madjanssen

on Mar 21, 2011 at 9:38 AM

He is my hero. Yes, if there were more parents like him, there would be more hope for the world. There are too many parents coddling and protecting the hell out of their kids because admitting their child is in the wrong would be to admit they failed as a parent. All we can do is try our best and do the right thing and if that still doesn't work at the end of the day, at least we know we tried and did our best and leave it to nature as we have done our nurturing part. I would follow this example in a heartbeat and it may kill me and my child may hate me for the rest of her life but she will know that I did the right thing too.

jalaz77

on Mar 21, 2011 at 9:49 AM

Good for him for not covering it up!! Those kids sound dangerous, breaking a 13y/o jaw???? What excuse did they have to gang up on a kid?? Anyways good for the dad If my kid was the victim I would hug that dad for saving my kid from something that could of ended worse. If my kids were the bully they would get a slap across the face then the police station.

momtothemax2910

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:07 AM

I'd hope I would because if I saw my kids doing that I'd want to clock them good.

PonyChaser

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:22 AM

I hope this new attitude toward bullying catches on. As more details are revealed about Casey Heynes, I support him more and more. And now this dad, turning his own kids in for assault. Parents need to be "mean". For too long, we've anguished over the fact that we want to be our kids' friends - our kids have friends. WE have friends. Our kids need guidance, specific rules, and concrete consequences. They have to know that when they cross that un-crossable line, the punishment will be swift and sure. And if it's not delivered by us, someone else will do it. All of this, "talk it out" stuff is fine, at first, when the problem is a little disagreement on the playground. But bullies need to know that there WILL be consequences for their behavior. And those consequences will not be a slap on the wrist and "go back to your classroom and THINK about what you've done!"

Nonmember comment from Uncle Roger

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:25 AM

At 15 and 17, of course they get taken to the police. They're pert near adults and if they're going to commit a crime they should be punished for it. The only regret I would have is for my own piss-poor parenting skills that led to that. (Mind you, I don't know the specifics of this situation -- did he even have custody? -- so I'm not commenting on this dad, just myself. But my kids definitely know better than to hit others, let alone beat someone up.)

Brea85

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:41 AM

He did awsome!! I like to think I would do the same, and on the way I'd be telling my child you better be glad Im taking you to the police because you wouldn't last if I get hold of you! bowing down Great EXAMPLE FOR PARENTS DAD!!!

ProudSingleMum

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:43 AM

Everyone's saying "I'd do it"...and I'd say the same thing. But one chat (or a private poll....)with the women on CM and you'll find that most will lie for their kids...just to keep them out of trouble. It's crap.

MamabearC

on Mar 21, 2011 at 10:55 AM

I would totally take them to the cops myself. I love my kids but I'm not going to lie for them and enable their terrible behavior;doing nothing and pretending they're angels that can do no wrong does more harm than good for the child and society...and THAT would be failing in doing my job as a parent.