Second Graders Having Oral Sex: Roll Out the Bubbles

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classroomPrepare to be so disgusted you can't see straight. A second grade teacher in California has been yanked out of the classroom after reports made their way to the school principal that students were performing oral sex on one another inside the classroom. Let me repeat that. Second graders. Oral sex.

I know grown women who have declared their marriages blow job-free zones. And we have second graders going down on one another? OMG, so much to do now. Pull my kid out of public school. Find a tutor. Cancel all future playdates. Cancel the cable. Fit her for a chastity belt!

Overreacting a scooch? OK, you got me. But when I saw the words "second grade" and "oral sex" in the same sentence, Mommy brain took over and normal sane adult woman brain went out for a stroll around the 'hood. I just don't need to think about 7-year-old mouths and yeeeeeech.

But then I sat back, crunched the numbers, realized I can't hire the tutor and can't live without those playdates for some Mom sanity. I caved. I went sane. 

Don't roll out the bubbles just yet, Mom and Dad. There's evidently a lot more going wrong here than one bad teacher. It sounds like at least one of these kids is being abused. Too quick a jump with too little information? Not really. One of the markers of sex abuse is a child who "demonstrates bizarre, sophisticated, or unusual sexual knowledge or behavior."

Oral sex is not normal behavior for kids in second grade. Even those who have yet to develop the "ewww, the opposite sex has cooties" attitude typical of 7-year-olds are generally thinking about holding hands, maybe a smooch on the cheek. In a 2003 survey of 580 ninth graders, with the average age of 14.5 years old, only 20 percent had yet engaged in oral sex. Even that was considered surprising by researchers, who found oral sex is becoming more acceptable among teens who consider it safer than intercourse for the prevention of (among other things) pregnancy.

Little kids do sexually experiment without abuse guiding the way, but it's generally self pleasuring. Sorry, Mom and Dad, but little kids masturbate too. They're fascinated by their changing bodies, and they have figured out it feels good. That's normal.

Going down on your BFF in the back of the classroom is not normal. And they've got to be learning it from somewhere. Just like the 5-year-old who comes to school threatening to "kill people" after hearing it from their parents. Our kids are going to be OK as long as we keep up our "non-oral sex at home" ways. Sadly, the same can't be said for these two kids in California.

 

Image via -Marlith-/Flickr

behavior, sex & dating, kid health