Better put another five bucks in her therapy jar is a common phrase in our house. It refers to any time we do something to our children that might come out on a counselor’s couch in a decade or so. “My mother forced me to eat green vegetables, and now I have nightmares of Brussels sprouts chasing me through the streets,” they might say.

It’s pretty much another way of saying, “Get over it.”

In 2008, when my second son was a baby, I took a seriously goofy photo of the two of us. I'd intended to try and get us both reflected in my bedroom mirror, but as soon as I got out the camera, he started lunging for the camera strap and I ended up with this ridiculous shot where half the photo is obscured by a blurry closeup of his intent little face.

I posted it on my blog as a joke -- look how many wonderful, flattering photos I have of me with my boys! -- and then I pretty much forgot about it.

Until I started seeing the incoming links. And then the comments:

Have you ever searched Facebook for someone you dated like fifteen years ago -- partially out of boredom, partially to see who aged better, you or him? (OMG, is that a bald spot? You win, girlfriend.) Some people call it Facebook stalking, but that's just a rude term for a perfectly normal activity. Humans are naturally curious, after all. So you searched an ex-lover on Facebook, who cares?

Well, I'm not saying anyone should care, but just as a possibly useful FYI, Facebook archives those searches of yours. As in, every single thing you search for, whether that's "David Smith" or "Tijuana donkey porn," is forever saved in your Facebook profile. Which might be awkward if someone else were to stumble upon it, you know what I mean?

I'm sure your search history is totally FINE. But juuuuust in case, here's how to clear the whole thing out.

SOPA, iPhone 5, Apple's crappy Maps app, oh my! Doesn't it already seem like these things were news forever ago? As we stare down the barrel of a brand new year, let's take a moment to revisit some of the hottest tech moments that happened in 2012:

Facebook went public. Facebook's much-anticipated IPO happened in May, drumming up so much media hoopla in the process it earned its own Wikipedia entry. It opened at $38/share, as of today's writing it's worth $25.91.

Here's something that must have been an awkward situation in Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg's family this week: his sister, Randi Zuckerberg, had one of her Facebook photos publicly posted on Twitter without her permission. Twitter user Callie Schweitzer shared a photo of the Zuckerberg family checking out Facebook's latest mobile app, Poke, before getting an angry response from Randi: "Not sure where you got this photo. I posted it to friends only on FB. You reposting it to Twitter is way uncool."

As it turns out, Schweitzer didn't exactly go out of her way to steal Zuckerberg's picture. It was right there in the top of Schweitzer's Facebook feed -- even though she isn't friends with Randi. Ironically, the CEO's own sister gave the perfect example of how inconsistent Facebook's privacy policy is.

Another day, another Facebook privacy policy update and this one has some pluses and some things that make me go meh. The new roll-out, which hit users Wednesday morning, makes it easier to choose which things you share with which groups, but it also makes it harder to hide.

Facebook has added Privacy Shortcuts, which will make it easier to choose who sees your stuff and who can contact you on the site. Included is a "block" button so that you can instantly remove exes of all kinds from your Facebook world with a single click.

This could come in handy ...

What you don't know about the mobile apps your kids are using might be putting them at risk, according to a new study from the Federal Trade Commission. Hundreds of mobile apps aren't being honest with parents about the types of personal information they're collecting about the kids using them, and that's not okay. They're also pushing advertising on kids, even in cases when they say they're not. 

"While we think most companies have the best intentions when it comes protecting kids' privacy, we haven't seen any progress when it comes to making sure parents have the information they need to make informed choices about apps for their kids," the FTC said. They studied 400 apps popular with kids on both Apple and Android devices. And what they found is shocking.

What do parents need to know?

Calm down, everybody. Facebook isn't trying to steal your information this time either.

I'm sure you've all seen your Facebook news feed is full of people posting legalese about how they own the copyright to their posts, but it's all unnecessary and a big hoax. Not only is Facebook clear about who owns what (you do), the odd status update is just fluff with no legal standing. It's inspired a flurry of status updates both posting the faux-legal update and counter-updates mocking the status updaters. It's even inspired a College Humor video.

But all this Facbook status panic is distracting everyone from the real privacy policy changes Facebook is making.