fireAmerica, it's time we have a talk. Pretty much anyone with a pulse has a Facebook page these days (seriously, anyone, I've seen babies with their own social media accounts). The trouble is, having a Facebook page and knowing how to use a Facebook page responsibly are two wildly different things, hence the reason people are constantly getting fired ... for being stupid on Facebook.

Think "constantly" is exaggerating? Well, try this number on for size: 8 percent of American companies say they've actually fired employees for social media mishegas. Don't want to be one of them?

Here are some of the craziest Facebook postings that have gotten folks canned. My advice? Don't try this at home ...

1. It may be impossible to get one of the guards at Buckingham Palace to crack so much as a smile when they're on duty, but when they're off duty, watch out! An 18-year-old working the gates at the famous landmark lost his gig at the royal wedding when he referred to Kate Middleton as a "posh bitch" in a rambling (and poorly spelled) rant shortly before the "I dos."

hur and william drove past me on friday n all a got was a shitty wave while she looked the opposite way from me, stupid stuck up cow am a not good enough for them! posh [b--ch] am totally with u on this 1 who reely gives a f*** about hur

2. When you work in customer service, you may want to be careful how you refer to customers ... and keep the racism to a minimum. Too bad a DTE Energy Company worker didn't get that memo. Here's the expletive-filled rant that got her canned back in November:

Got to work this morning and we currently have 275,000 customers without power! White people in Oakland county are b****** right now ... they got f***** up lol...And don't call me acting a g****** fool...I will hang up on yo a**!  ***THIS HAS BEEN YOUR DTE REPRESENTATIVE PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT***

3. Waitstaff don't always get the respect they deserve, and no doubt they have it hard. But if you're in the business of bringing folks food, creating a Facebook page called "Don't F--k With Servers" might not be the best way to boost tips. A Duffy's Restaurant in West Palm Beach canned the guy who created the page ... right after he ranted about a 10 percent tip on a big bill.

4. Got a big mouth and not afraid to use it? Then maybe a job in child welfare isn't for you. Here's what got one Oregon child protective services worker fired in 2013:

So today I noticed a Self-Sufficiency client getting into a newer BMW. What am I doing wrong here?

5. Teachers, take heed! School districts don't exactly look kindly on racist rants on Facebook like this one that lost an Ohio teacher his job:

I don’t mind if you come from the ghetto to trick or treat. But when you whip out your teeny [genitalia] and [urinate] on the telephone pole in front of my front yard and a bunch of preschoolers and toddlers, you can take your [N-word] ass back where it came from. I don’t have anything against anyone of color, but [racial slur] stay out.

6. If you're in the military, here's a hint, you might want to be careful when talking about the president, at least when it comes to being directly insubordinate to your boss! One Marine got an "other than honorable" discharge in 2012 for saying:

Screw Obama. I will not follow all orders from him.

7. A Wal-Mart employee found out the hard way last fall that posting a photo of customers with racists slurs is a good way to get a pink slip. The photo showed two Muslim women in full burqas, with the following:

Halloween came early this year ... do they really have to [f--kin] dress like that ... your in my country ... get that [f--kin s--t] off!!!!!

8. Sometimes work can be a little, well, boring! But a teenager found out the hard way that you don't share that information with the world ... lest your boss finds someone else who appreciates the paycheck that comes with said boredom a bit more than you do!

9. Employers don't look kindly on drug users on staff, something a 21-year veteran dispatcher for the Wisconsin city of West Allis MIGHT have thought of before she announced she was addicted to "Vicodin, Adderall, quality marijuana, MD 20/20 grape, and absinthe" on her Facebook wall. Dana Kuchler said it was a joke, but the city didn't care -- she lost her job.

10. Threatening violence to the president won't just make you look like a moron ... it can also get you in trouble at work. Just ask the Texas fire captain who lost his job on the squad for posting a photo of President Obama with a noose around his neck!

11. If you've ever been to a doctor's office or hospital, you've probably signed some paperwork about HIPPA -- the law that protects your privacy as a patient. But that doesn't mean healthcare workers always follow it! A California health center had to fire not one, not two, not three, but FIVE nurses back in 2010 for posting personal information about their patients.

12. Patient information isn't the only thing that nurses should keep off Facebook. One staff nurse lost her job after 12 years at a medical center when a co-worker spotted this on her page:

Instead of spending my birthday celebrating, I will be working all night cleaning up feces. I loathe that effin heffer!!! Burn in hell you effed up spawn of satan. I curse you and wish you a lifetime of pain and suffering. That is not enough, right now I would give anything you small you down and pound you to unconsciousness. ‘Tang ina* mo!!!!!

Thanks to the effin heifer who royally effect up my schedule, not only am I working Mothers Day, my birthday and my anniversary. And this Friday, I will be getting the smallest paycheck I had in 12 years due to the 17 percent pay cut we had to endure.

13. When you think team mascots, you probably don't think of a guy who makes hardcore decisions for the team ... and maybe the Pittsburgh Pirates Pierogi should have thought about that before he posted this status that took him outta the game in 2010:

Coonelly extended the contracts of Russell and Huntington through the 2011 season. That means a 19-straight losing streak. Way to go Pirates.

14. Pulling an anti-Semitic prank? You might not want to put that online. A New England Patriots cheerleader had to hand in her pom poms back in 2008 when the team learned she'd posted photos of herself, a pal, and a passed out friend ... who had two swastikas drawn on his face, plus the words "penis" and "I'm a Jew."

15. Waitress Dayna Morales made front-page news around the world when she posted a photo of a receipt with a gay slur on it that she said was directed at her (she's a lesbian). The only problem? It turns out Dayna made the whole thing up! No surprise her bosses fired her for the stunt, huh?

What is the dumbest thing you've ever seen someone post on Facebook?

 

Image by Jeanne Sager