9 Types of Judgmental Internet Commenters (in Cat Form)

LOL 9

I have a cat, which means I'm constantly being criticized for every single thing that I do. You cat people know what I'm talking about, right? Owning a dog is like having a tiny robot arm attached to your back that delivers an endless series of reassuring pats -- you got out of your chair! Hooray for YOU! You walked across the room! You're AMAZING! -- but owning a cat basically means you're sharing your house with a personalized, fur-covered burn book. Sure, cats may occasionally sit in your lap and purr and appear to be adoring, but as soon as you turn your back, they're noting your various shortcomings: "FAILED TO FILL KIBBLE BOWL TO THE TOP. STROKED FUR .00002 SECONDS TOO LONG. DIDN'T IMMEDIATELY OPEN FRONT DOOR UPON REQUEST."

Cats are judgmental as hell, which means they're an awful lot like Internet commenters. Specifically, angry commenters who flock to parenting articles. That's right, dear readers, I'm talking about some of YOU.

Observe:

The commenter who is absolutely disgusted by your language. Just disgusted. And you call yourself a mother!

Via TomStockton.US

The commenter who would like to correct you on that tiny typo in the second paragraph.


The commenter who straight-up doesn't like you. Nope. Not one little bit.

Via Grumpy Cat

The commenter who just really feels sorry for your children.

Via Cracked

The commenter who would never make the same parenting choices you do.

Via Daily Mail

The commenter who just has to laugh at how wrong you are. So, so wrong.

Via ehacke/Flickr

The commenter who -- what did you just say? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? She will fight you RIGHT NOW, she swears to god.


Image via fraise/Flickr

The commenter who is so bored she didn't even read this, but for some reason left a lengthy comment saying so.

Via black_pearl_10/Flickr

The commenter who cannot even believe you wrote this crap. This is, no kidding, the most stupid thing in the entire world. She just hopes you're proud.


Via City-Data


Which comment cats do you encounter on a regular basis?

 

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D.j. Lord

I do get a kick out of people who open the story then leave a comment saying its none of their bizness..

SNAPA SNAPA

OMG!!!  I have to wipe down my computer monitor because I just blasted it with oatmeal...BWAHAHAHA!!  I love this!!

nonmember avatar Alexandra

The cats are so precious!

Angel M Ponder

You forgot the commenter who thinks your article is cute

redK8... redK8blueSt8

HA! Thanks for the laugh. Cats are judgmental, and yet, like a middle school preteen I just want Ms. Too-Cool to like me. :-)

nekoy... nekoyukidoll

Love Tarder Sauce (=^・・^=)

Borde... BorderlinePanic

Perfect! I'm pretty sure my cat likes to critique my sexual expertise. He stays on the bed the whole time lmao.

nonmember avatar Angelika

Just love this! And you are so right about cats. There are 7 in my life and I'm a slave to all of them.

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