In general, I am a live and let live kind of person on Facebook. I say post what you want. I would never smear a person who posts photos of their dog or their baby or their awesome trip to Thailand (even if I am crazy envious!), but I draw the line at photos of flowers and other gifts. And don't even get me started on engagement rings.
It's not even that I am envious. My husband brings me my fair share of flowers and I have a lovely, nicely sized engagement ring I absolutely love. I just think posting photos of them is tacky.
Posting those photos serves only one purpose: to make people jealous. Women think it makes their boyfriend or husband look so romantic and sweet, but in many cases, it just makes them look kind of insecure. So seriously, cut that out.
A few months back, we talked about not wearing a bikini in Facebook photos. Personally, that never bothers me. If a woman works hard for her bod, then post away. But flowers? Rings? Chocolate? Candy? Unless it's totally unusual, surprising, or somehow otherwise meaningful, then why post the photos?
I just don't get it.
It might be because I am not a gift person in general, but honestly, not everyone needs to know every time your husband brings home flowers. Not everyone needs to see the size of your diamond. And not everyone needs to see the diamond tennis bracelet or watch he bought you, either.
It's not that I am opposed to public declarations of love on Facebook, either. By all means, tell me if you husband built a playhouse by hand or carved a new dining room table from an old barn door. Tell me if he nursed you back to health or made a killer meal. Love is wonderful. But love isn't flowers. Or diamonds. Or material goods at all.
In general, the whole "what did you get for Christmas from your husband" competition just seems silly to me. And social media lends a whole other voyeuristic quality to that.
It's great that you have a boyfriend who brings you flowers or diamonds or cruise tickets or whatever. But that doesn't make a good boyfriend. Those things are much more subtle. So the flowers you are using to try to make people jealous? Are pretty transparent. Just stop.
Do you ever post gift photos on Facebook?
Image via patrickjona/Flickr
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Comments 20
I do my fair share of eye rolling at an acquaintance from high school whose Facebook status often reads something like, "OMG! Another Coach purse! I'm running out of closet space!" I couldn't care less that she has (multiple) Coach purses, but putting it on Facebook seems a little sad and desperate for attention.
I don't see a problem with it at all. I post pictures when my husband does those things for me because it is sweet and thoughtful and I want to share it with all of my friends and family. It's not about trying to make anyone feel jealous at all. Why would I want to make people jealous anyway, what purpose does that serve?
I personally don't mind seeing pictures of material things on facebook. My cousin's new fiance just posted a picture of her huge ring and all I thought was "wow...he did a great job picking that out" (even though my aunt helped him because she has excellent taste lol). The only time I ever got mad was when a friend, whom I do not speak to over this, was crying to me that she couldnt afford food and clothes for her kids and was hitting a extremely rough patch and getting behind in bills and I gave her a substantial amount of money. Money that i had been saving to buy my family a new TV for Christmas. And she turned around and posted a picture of a brand new falt screen TV that she purchased as and early Christmas gift for her deadbeat boyfriend. This girl had been my best friend for 10 years and that really stung. I now see her as a liar and munipilator because of facebook.
I will not, and nobody should, edit their life on or off facebook out of fear of making someone jealous.
I post lots of things intended to make my friends jealous, and it works! And I'm jealous of things they post. But because we're FRIENDS, its good natured jealousy, and we're always still happy for eachother, even if we sometimes wish we had that bikini bod, or diamond ring, or mommy who spoils us at christmas time even though we're 30ish.
and this is yet another reason i will avoid FB. really, sasha brown-worsham? i try not to call out bloggers too much around these parts (because that road runs two ways, and we all have opinions) but this is just a fluff piece that makes you sound like an old maid who's jealous she never got gifts from her "beloved" boyfriend. wow, you would only care about a gift from your boyfriend if he made it himself? sorry, but my husband works nearly 80 hours a week to help support our family and take care of us. if he has the time to stop and pick me up a slurpee on the way home out of love for me, i take it! you're right, love is not just material things - but even material things can have a greater message of love.
I love seeing my friends happy and in love. Also, I LOVE LVOE LOVE the engagement ring photos, they're beautiful and why wouldn't you be excited at your engagement ring?