facebookIn the least surprising news of the year, a study recently found that with the invention of Facebook came an influx of crime. Bad crimes. Crimes like murder and rape. I know, you're shocked, right? Police in Queensland, Australia found that, last year alone, about 5,000 offenses had a link to the social networking site. And if 5,000 doesn't seem like a lot to you, let's put it in perspective: That number can be translated into one "Facebook" crime every two hours.

One crime cited in this report involved a woman being punched in the face at a bus stop after the attacker approached her and said: "I hear you are going to sue me." In another one, a mother claimed that she was assaulted in a parking lot because of something that originally occurred on Facebook.

Facebook is cool for lots of reasons, but at the same time, to put it inelegantly, it sucks. And I speak from experience: I recently was without it for a week

Okay, well, I wasn't totally without it. But I was without power, so checking it was relegated strictly to my iPhone. And my iPhone usage was relegated strictly to how much gas I had since I could only charge it in my car. And I didn't have a lot of gas. So, yeah. You get what I'm saying.

Anyway, here's what I realized: There are way less anxieties in life without Facebook, and the Internet in general. It's like you have all this space in your brain just waiting to be used for non-idiotic stuff. Really.

I certainly don't wish to go back to my recent days of no power or heat (with an infant!), but there was something ... I don't know ... natural, for lack of a better word, about it. My family talked with one another -- albeit, there were moments of extreme pissyness. We bundled up and went for walks, because there was literally nothing to do. And I was completely unaware of the trivial things other people were doing. (IE, no "Just m'nails done!" status updates.) I knew everyone I cared about was safe, and that was that. Didn't need more information.

When we got power back on Saturday night, it was glorious. Seriously, a relief-filled moment, if there ever was one. We were warm and toasty and content; back to "normal" life after days of being anything but. But we also were back to zoning out on our computers and mindlessly watching television. In a way, it was sort of sad.

I made a half-assed promise to myself that I was going to stop going on Facebook and Instagram and whatever other social media time sucks I happen upon -- or at least limit my time on them. But it's been three days, and, thus far, can't say I've followed through. And that kind of bums me out. 

Do you ever wish social media didn't exist?


Image via stoneysteiner/Flickr