Man Catches Wife Sexting, Talks to Cats, Then Shoots Her

catsIt seems like every other day there's a story in the world of tech news that involves a man and a woman getting into some crazy altercation over sexting. A man catches his wife sexting with the neighbor; a woman catches her husband sexting with the nanny. Same soup, different bowl. We've all heard so many renditions of this story that they're not even interesting anymore. Not the case with this one. In this episode of "Explosive Arguments Stemmed from Sexting," a man smoked weed, talked to his cats, then tried to shoot his wife.

Everyone's fine, don't worry. Here's what happened: Thomas Paul Nunes and his wife Lisa, a former Oregon City police lieutenant, were having marital problems, but nonetheless decided to go out for a night of drinking together. While they were out, Thomas realized that Lisa was getting sexy time photos from another dude (AKA peen pics), and rightfully, he was pissed off. He snatched Lisa's phone away from her and went back to their house to scroll through all of her messages -- where what he found was bad times. However, what he chose to do next is where things get unique. Instead of up and leaving Lisa's cheating ass, Thomas smoked marijuana and "talked to his cats for about 20 minutes to calm himself and 'reason out a plan.'" The plan they came up with was to shoot Lisa in her sleep. Er, correction, to wake Lisa up with a bullet near her skull.

Thomas fired a gun that belonged to Lisa in the guest room where she was sleeping, and the bullet landed a foot over her head. He claims he wasn't trying to harm her, but with the bullet being that close -- and him being drunk and stoned and full of cat advice -- it's hard to say. Thomas then turned the weapon in to Oregon police (by showing up at the station with the gun strapped to his ankle). He's since been sentenced to 10 years in prison, and Lisa has filed for divorce.

So. What is the moral of the story here? I think it's three-fold. One, don't sext with other people when you're already in a relationship -- it will always end poorly (especially if you sext with other people in front of the person you're in a relationship with). Two, don't confer with small animals when trying to figure out what to do if you catch your significant other sexting with someone else. And, three, just went you think sexting stories are getting banal and derivative, a Thomas Nunes comes along. So stay tuned.

Have you ever caught a significant other sexting? Have you ever been caught sexting?

 

Image via Chipmonkey/Flickr

cell phone, communication, texting

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heleo... heleowens

This article made me giggle a little bit, not in the fact that a man tried to shoot his wife, or the fact that she was cheating on him, but that he took advice from his cats!  As an animal lover, I totally understand talking to your pets and feeling better, but my cat never gave me advice like this!!

nonmember avatar HS

I completely agree with heleowens! I wonder if the cats were brought in for questioning since they seemed to be in on the plan or failed to alert authorities *hehe*

butte... butterflyfreak

Yep, I think the cats should be booked on conspiracy to commit murder!

TAG_u... TAG_ur_it

cats are shady little f*kers...  gonna have to keep my eye on ours lol

Samantha Lea

Everyone knows cats are all about murder. Murder and naps.

AniAngel AniAngel

Yes this is freaking hilarious! Not the violence but just about every thing else. "Murder and naps" priceless.

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